


Snow and Fur

by InkyJustine



Category: Uncharted (Video Games)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Western, Angst with a Happy Ending, First Time, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Hypothermia, Injury, Love Confessions, M/M, Sibling Incest, Winter, Wolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-11
Updated: 2017-05-11
Packaged: 2018-10-19 15:44:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 26,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10642965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkyJustine/pseuds/InkyJustine
Summary: It was the end of Fall when Nathan's horse threw him. Things only went downhill from there, until they got better. So much better.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I really want to write more long stuff for these boys! This took me so long tho.  
> A couple of dear friends looked this over in an earlier version, so all remaining mistakes are my own. :V Aaaaaaaaa

It was the end of Fall when Nathan's horse threw him. Throughout the last few months, the leaves had yellowed and covered the ground. Of course that had nothing to do with why his loyal steed suddenly reared. It might have had more to do with how the weather had changed so drastically from one moment to the next.

"Crap!", Nathan yelled as it reared up on its hindlegs. It was the only thing he had _time_ to say and then the only thing he could _do_ was hold on as tightly as he could as it bucked underneath him with sudden fright. In his ears the wind roared, drowning out any other noises. 

It had been such a nice and sunny day when he had broken up his camp this morning. The birds had been singing and the prospect of finding a nice village to hunker down in for the Winter had put a spring in his step.

Now he was clinging to his horse’s neck, forced to squeeze his eyes shut against the big snowflakes all but pelting his face and blinding him. From one moment to the next Winter had suddenly set in. Where had the Fall gone? Nathan could have sworn that he still had at least a month left to find that nice village that had been his goal. Fortune was not on his side this season or this whole year it seemed. Much like the ones before. Ever since… He didn’t like to remember those days.

Frantically, Nathan tried to think of something. Snow swirled around his ears, blocking out any other sounds. Except of course his horse's frightened neighing, being so close to his face since he had hunched over its neck to get at least a little relief from the weather.

Then, just as suddenly as the horse had leapt forward, it stopped at _nothing_ as far as Nathan could tell, almost making him lose his hold on the reins; except he hadn't really seen anything at all. His world had turned white, with some splashes of gray and brown where trees passed by on either side of them. They were _supposed_ to be on a trail, but Nathan wasn't sure if they were still on it at all.

Nathan sucked in a breath that the gallop through the forest had stolen from him and loosened his grip. It was a mistake, he realized, a _rookie mistake_ when a moment later a sense of vertigo gripped him and Nathan cried out as his horse reared _again_. By now his fingers were about frozen solid, but it hardly mattered.

"Crap!" His voice didn't carry through the wall of snow as he shouted and finally lost his hold around the stiff reins. The world tilted on its axis and Nathan found himself in a snow drift, horse gone.

For a dazed second, he stayed where he had fallen. He _really_ should have put on the thicker pair of gloves as soon as the first snowflakes had started their gentle descent, but he had thought it was just a passing fancy, not the onset of freaking _Winter_. Who could have thought that it would turn into a bloody snowstorm after only a few minutes. It was like the clouds had simply opened up and proceeded to dump their whole contents all in one go. And just on him, too, probably. It was just one of those days. Then he shook himself out of those morose thoughts. They weren’t about to help him.

"Today is really your lucky day, Nate," he berated himself, pushing himself to his knees and checking himself over for any injuries. Everything he owned was on that horse, now on its merry way to whichever small village had to be closest. If there was one close at all. On the map he had studied, there had been one, but Nate couldn't even remember its name. It had been so small. One street and a few houses strewn on either side of it. In fact, calling it a village was putting it nicely.

Nathan cursed under his breath. It had been supposed to be his little village for the cold months. With a last curse, he struggled to his feet and looked around. The last time he had come through this area with his brother, he had had seen two houses, tops. Then again, that had been fifteen years ago. He wasn’t even sure if he would have heard news if the settlement had disappeared for good. But the surrounding area was good for a bit of farming and hunting and mining. Maybe the horse was going to have a nice life there anyway, if wolves or wild dogs didn't get it before that. With the sudden snow, if it was going to last, they would grow hungry quickly.

Hell even in the village it might still end up as meat for hungry people.

"What a happy thought," Nathan muttered under his breath. He wasn't altogether keen on turning into wolf food either, or bear food, or any food for any predator roaming the forest. It had been better when he had still been on his way together with Sam. His brother would have known what to do. He just hoped the snow wouldn't last for too long. None of this had been planned for.

"Should have listened to Sully," Nathan grumbled, blowing on his hands and hunching his shoulders against the unforgiving wind. The old man had told him to stay put and try his luck next year. Sully had told him, too, that his rashness was going to get him kill. Considering his situation, Nathan had to grudgingly agree. He really hoped there were no wolves around.

As if he had called them, a long mournful howl pierced the sounds of the storm and sent a shiver down Nathan's spine. The storm dimmed any and all other noises, except for those. Figures, Nathan thought, shivering miserably in the cold. If he had followed Sully’s advice, he would be somewhere warm right now, possibly with a beautiful woman in his lap.

"Crap," he muttered a third time, more quietly as if that was going to keep the wolves from discovering him and taking a bite. Either them or the cold would get him, he knew. Already his fingers were hurting and it felt as if ice was creeping into every crack and gap of his clothes. The last village was too far for walking. Hell, he didn't even know where the next one _was_ ; in which direction he was supposed to turn. Snowflakes were obscuring his vision. He wouldn't even be able to find it if he tried in the thick swirling snow. He didn't even know where he was anymore, where there was north or west or east because falling off the horse had turned his senses around. The horse might as well have run _ahead_ of him. How should he know at this point and he couldn’t consult his compass, since _it was on his freaking horse_.

Helplessly, Nathan looked around him and stuck his hands underneath his arms to stave off the frostbite. The only thing still left to him was his rifle and his revolver. So, at least he could defend himself, if he could keep his hand steady while shaking from the cold.

"Just keep on walking, Nate," he told himself and set out in a direction at random. It was better than staying here in any case. After all, no one was going to come looking for him and this way he had at least a chance of finding some kind of shelter. Sully had called him a fool and, miserably, Nathan had to agree with him once again. If he survived this he had to listen to Sully more often.

A few minutes later his teeth were chattering and the wind buffering him from side to side made him stumble and almost walk into a tree.

"This time I really fucked up," Nate told himself. It did absolutely nothing to make him feel better about his situation. Ice crusted his lashes and froze his hair stiff. At least it felt like that. He was a little too scared to reach up and possibly find strands of it or, worse, his fingers breaking off. A few miles back everything had been _fine_. He had thought this time around he could maybe find the lost city after all. Every clue, every document he had found, everything was pointing him back to this place that had so failed him so many years ago.

He never would find out now, he decided. This place had robbed him off his brother and now it may rob him of his life. His legs hurt and it grew harder and harder to take another step.  
"K-keep moving," Nathan told himself, because when he laid down he would die.

The world was white and white and white and suddenly it tilted again and Nathan tasted melting snow on his tongue with the ground underneath his cheek.

There was another howl, closer this time. Much closer and Nathan tried to quickly and furtively get his feet underneath himself when a wolf stepped out from the undergrowth. Or leaped and then stopped just as suddenly when it caught sight of Nathan.

"G-good d-dog," Nathan said, teeth chattering, because he had always been a fool to make quips in dangerous situations. Sam had always laughed at him afterward.

The wolf snarled, showing Nathan his sharp-looking fangs.

"I w-wouldn't m-make a g-good m-meal, I s-swear."

It cocked its head. Nathan had never seen a wolf do that. It was reminiscent more of what a dog would do, he thought. He and his brother used to have one for a little while before it got shot by a bunch of bandits. Animals never used to last long around them. They traveled around too often and got attacked too much.

"I-If y-you w-w-would j-ju-just p-point me t-to t-the n-nearest village I'll be r-right out of y-your fur," Nathan joked weakly, still on his knees.  
The wolf was acting rather unlike any stories Nathan had heard before. For one it hadn't leapt at him yet and torn out his throat. That was something Nathan could appreciate of course. He had an inkling he wouldn't like getting his throat torn out. For one it would be messy. Not that he would really notice that, since he would be dead. Jesus, even in his head he was babbling.

To his confusion, the wolf turned around and looked at Nathan over its shoulder before walking in between the trees. When Nathan didn't get to his feet, it stopped and to Nathan's surprise came back only to walk away once more.

Nathan let out what could only be called a 'meep' with chattering teeth in it, when the wolf honest to god butted his head against Nathan's shoulder and kept on doing that until Nathan levered himself to his feet with a hand bracing himself on the wolf's back.

He followed it. There wasn't much else to do but wait until the cold killed him.

"Are you s-someone's p-pet? P-please don't l-lead me into a t-trap. I s-swear I'm n-not usually t-this trusting." Nathan's voice was weak now and he stumbled, cut open his frozen skin when he shot out a hand to brace himself against the trunk of a tree before he could fall again. Another lie down and he wouldn't get up again, ever. He could feel it. Darkness edged into his vision. Breathing was becoming difficult with how the chilly air pierced the inside of his throat and made his nose run. How long had it been since he fell? He had no idea. For all he knew he could have fallen off his horse hours ago. The light had dimmed, but maybe that was only the doing of the close-set trees. Off the path there were just more of them, crowding him in.

A few steps later his foot hooked on a hidden root and brought him to his knees with a startled shout. He didn't get up right away, couldn't find the strengths to do it. His arms felt as if someone had removed the bones. They felt rubbery and weak. Then the wolf stepped way too close for comfort, shoved its nose into Nathan's face before burying sharp fangs in his sleeve, barely missing his flesh and pulled him forward almost off his knees. That was a motivation if any. Get up or get bitten. Nathan let out a yelp.

"Yeah, y-yeah, I w-wasn't r-resting," Nathan stuttered out, voice lost to the storm. Under its breath, the wolf snarled. Its eyes looked fierce and angry, but Nathan couldn't really care. He was too cold. Death felt like it could be a mercy.

Only when Nathan was back on his feet did the fangs let him go, trailing down as Nathan struggled up so the sharp teeth were always just a fabric-width away from his flesh. Then it turned away, with another growl. The wolf's tail was barely visible in the swirling snow, but Nathan fixed his gaze on its hypnotic sway anyway. It was like a hook that dragged him forward, one step at a time through the storm while his body wanted to do nothing but lie down. Soon he forgot everything around him, except the cold and the tail in front of him. The door came as a sudden surprise as the wolf veered off to the side. Nathan almost walked into it. For a dreadful moment he stared at the wolf in incomprehension. It returned his stare with one of expectation, turning its head from Nathan, to the door, and back.

The last time he had been so close to a wolf was over a decade ago. _That one_ had stormed into the clearing he had been resting in and almost killed him. This one was different. It was acting weird.

"R-right." The 'thanks' got swallowed, Nathan felt too weary to even move his mouth or anything, but he gathered his strength to open the door, praying that it wasn’t frozen shut as he leaned against the wood and forwent the politeness of a knock. 

He fell inside when the door gave way under his weight, as if it had only loosely hung on its hinges. Inside, a thin layer of dust caught him, but did nothing much for breaking his fall. Instead it swirled up and made him cough while the wolf stepped around him and sneezed. Snow blew in and Nathan pulled himself to his feet, pressed against the door and barred it with the lock he found on the inside. His stiff fingers slipped countless times before he got the blasted thing latched. But at least he was inside, out of the cold even if the inside of the cottage was only marginally warmer than the outside world.

The wolf butted him again and after a confused moment Nathan followed him over to a stack of wood, as if the wolf had him on a leash, leading him wherever it needed him. Nathan was glad for it. His thoughts were sluggish and he was trembling all over. A sudden fear gripped him that if he was going to shake even more his teeth may be in danger of shaking right out of his jaw.

With the wood separating them from the storm outside, the noises had lessened a bit. But Nathan still shook hard enough that snow fell off his shoulders. A stack of wood was located against the wall beside the fireplace. It looked deserted, dust covered everything. Nathan's muscles ached from the cold and he hissed as he made them move by sheer force of will, stumbling through the room and collapsing in front of the fireplace. He startled when the wolf let a log drop beside him.

"T-t-thanks," he uttered. By now his voice was nothing more than a weak and unsteady whisper. There were matches on the mantelpiece, though, luckily for him. He reached for them after stacking the wood up and shoving paper among the timber, that the wolf brought to his side. Blood welled up from a small cut as he pulled his hand away from the paper. Nathan was too tired to roll his eyes and instead only wiped it off on his pants. Later, he was going to treat his cuts, once his hands were steady enough again.

A moment later flames flickered tentatively to life and Nathan scooted even closer. He stared into the fire and letting it warm him, coaxing it higher. Whoever had lived here, had dried the wood well, it caught quickly and the resulting heat sent pins and needles through Nathan's limbs. His hands had taken on a worrying shade blue, Nathan thought and with a pained hiss stuck them underneath his armpits for extra warmth. Fangs dug into his shirt when he swayed forward, black spots dotting his vision, and pulled him back.

Nathan shook his head to disperse the fog inside his mind, but that only made the room spin worse. The wolf pressed against his side when Nathan reached a hand up to his forehead. Yeah, he would just sit here for a while until he felt better.

Slowly, Nathan's shaking settled, the cold being chased away by the warmth of the fire. It felt like it took an age and he didn't notice his eyes slipping shut or the way he slumped to the side, nor the way the wolf eyed him for a moment before slinking closer with a curious expression on its face.

Then he dreamed of the wolf. It moved around him in the cottage. Strangely enough, it had a log of wood in its snout which it carefully threw into the fireplace with a jerk of its head. How weird, Nathan thought, but he couldn't move. His limbs felt like lead. The wolf turned its head and looked at him with flames dancing in its hazel eyes. He'd seen those eyes before, fifteen years ago. The wolf had the eyes of his brother...

Nathan woke up with the fire warming his front and a weight at his back, shielding him against the chill of the room. The weight confused him. His brow crinkled in through before he even opened his eyes. The fire was still crackling merrily. He figured that he had probably stacked it up sometime in the night. That or he hadn't actually slept as long as his body told him. His bladder was insisting to find someplace private soon. But the weight... he hadn't brought anyone home with him last night from the pub. In fact he couldn't remember drinking at all. He had been on his way to find a treasure...

With a gasp his hand flew to the revolver at his side and he sat up, looking wildly around him at the interior of a shack that most definitely was not his own. It couldn't be his. He had burnt his and Sam's in a fit of drunken melancholy not long after his brother had disappeared. Sully had called him an idiot and ever since he had lived with the old man unless he was out on an adventure. And he was on adventures often, seeking out new places and stealing to get by. The family business of sorts, passed down from their father and later continued out of necessity. Although their mother used to be the scholarly type, as much as her situation had allowed her.

But that wasn't important. Not when there was a big wolf lying behind him, staring back at him from one baleful hazel eye. Now in the light of day it didn't remind him of his brother's eyes that much anymore. For one, they were looking out at him from a wolf's face and his brother had been way less furry, despite the hair on his chest. Nathan quickly stopped his thoughts going somewhere inappropriate. Instead he focused on the fact that he had been resting against it. A wolf, no matter how nice it had acted the day before. It had lead him to this shack.

Why had he rested against it?

The memories were quick to return, bringing with them the recollection of the storm and the fact that his freaking horse had bolted with all his belongings. A freak storm out of nowhere, a creepy forest and a wolf. That sounded like a fairytale and on second thought Nathan wasn't sure if it hadn't been the wolf that had frightened his horse.

Carefully, Nathan scooted away from the animal, all the while suppressing his first instinct, which was to yell and flail and probably get himself killed. His hand still on his weapon he moved as slowly as he dared to. The rifle was still slung over his back, digging awkwardly into his side. How fast was a wolf again? He had a feeling it would be faster than him if he were to try and shoot it. There was not enough distance between them by far. On the other hand, they were close enough that Nathan could only hit his target.

The wolf's eye followed his motion but made no move to get to its paws. That was... that was rather weird, as far as wolf behavior went. Slowly, Nathan let his hand sink again. Just as weird as the behavior the day before.

"Guess you don't want to kill me, huh?" Nathan winced at the sound of his own voice in the quiet of the cottage. Great, did wolves like loud noises? He really should have learned more about them. More knowledge about wolves was bound to come in handy at some point or another, the evidence was all but staring him in the face.

Goddamn, it looked huge even lying down.

When the wolf did nothing but stare at him, Nathan took the chance to look around the shack. Dust was everywhere, creating a layer on every available surface. His footsteps and those of the wolf were the only thing that had disturbed it for a while. The place had been abandoned.

Not for the first time Nathan wished that Sam was with him. He would have known what to do.

Still moving carefully, Nathan got to his feet. Again the wolf made no move to follow. Instead, it closed its eyes, apparently figuring that Nathan was not going to flail at him or shoot and that he was no tasty morsel either. Nathan kept it in his sight out of the corner of his eye, but it didn't stir again except for the soft rising and falling of its back.

"Friendly wolf," Nathan muttered as he took stock of his surrounding. The wolf flicked an ear in his direction as the only sign that it was paying attention to him at all. Maybe it was a pet. The thought had crossed Nathan's mind before. A pet wolf whoever had lived in this cottage had tamed from birth. It would explain why it had lead him here. Nathan had heard about people taking in pups after accidentally, or not so accidentally, killing their parents.

His palms reminded him of the cuts his stroll through the woods had given him as he wiped them on his pants to get rid of the dust. They stung. If he still had his belongings, he could have treated them. Now he would have to make do with what he found.

The shack was small and comfortable, with an emphasis on small. It didn't take long to take everything in. In fact, a glance pretty much showed it all. There was a bed, or rather a cot, beside the fireplace that Nathan hadn't noticed the night before in his state. The other side of the fireplace held the stack of firewood, covering the whole wall up to the ceiling. It was good wood, the kind that burned long and hot, but he hoped that there was more stacked outside along with some coal. A table with a single chair, a few shelves, a washbasin, a dresser and a cupboard completed the room. Various tools lined the walls, too, above the furniture. All in all it was a well-stocked cottage it seemed.

His boots left further tracks in the dust, swirling it upwards, and Nathan sneezed, startling the wolf. They stared at each other for a tense minute before the wolf laid its head back on its paws as if nothing had happened and the moment passed. Talking of which, its paws were big. The whole wolf was bigger than Nathan had ever seen a wolf be before. Not that Nathan was some kind of expert on them, but he had shot a wolf once when Sam was still with him, and that one had been smaller. Most wolves he had seen had been at a distance. They were shy. Usually. Except for this one obviously.

Nathan shook his head. Maybe he was just imagining things. Most likely it was the regular size and his memory was only playing tricks on him. 

Why was he even thinking about this so much? He was probably still confused from his fall. He could vaguely remember hitting his head. Sam wouldn’t have let him get out of bed. Without thinking about it, Nathan’s hand rose to his head. It didn’t matter what his brother would have done. _He wasn’t here._

The growling of his stomach pulled Nathan out of his morose thoughts. Food. He needed food. 

A quick rummage through his pockets produced a few pieces of jerky, put there when he had chewed on some of it during his journey. It was better than nothing. The rest of his supplies was still on his horse…. somewhere. He pulled it out. Almost immediately the wolf lifted its head at the smell. The hungry look was frightening enough that Nathan let his hand drop to the revolver at his side, still there from when he had collapsed yesterday. For a moment he was torn between pulling his weapon or just throwing the jerky to the wolf and call it a safety measure. Nathan still felt tired and keyed up at the same time. A very fine tremble shook his limbs. Jesus, maybe he should just have another lie-down; only adrenalin seemed to keep him on his feet.

Nathan gathered his thoughts. Then, decision made, he tore off some of the dried meat and threw it to the wolf.

"Here, consider it a bribe to _not_ eat me," he joked but even to his own ears his voice seemed a little weak, a little scared. The wolf looked down at the jerky lying in the dust. Alright, so, Nathan felt a little like he should have made more of an effort not to give the wolf something to eat that had lain in the dirt, but then... wolves ate cadavers right? A little dust probably beat eating something that had been dead for a few days, at least. Nathan caught himself holding his breath. When the wolf picked up the meat with sharp fangs, now a little or lot more dusty than before, and swallowed it down, Nathan let it out again. He watched the wolf lick its muzzle.

"Nice wolf," Nathan soothed with a voice that was a little steadier. If the wolf decided to pounce now to get to the piece still in Nathan's hand, he wouldn't be able to pull and shoot his revolver fast enough. Besides, it would have done so already. They had _cuddled_ , or at least the shaggy beast had cuddled up to _him_. Did that mean they were now friends? The thought made a smile tug at the corner of Nathan’s lips.

The wolf stared at him for an eternity with a thoughtful look on its face. At least it felt like that to Nathan, who wouldn’t even call _himself_ a patient man at the best of times, never mind anyone else. Sam had always criticized that about him. The memory made Nathan chuckle. His brother hadn’t exactly lead by example in that regard. 

Once again his stomach growled, sounding loud in the silence and the wolf blinked, once, before laying his head back on his paws, going back to ignoring Nathan. Or feigning it. It's ears were still pointed in his direction, Nathan noticed.

Nathan bit off some of the jerky and chewed. Melting snow for water would be next on his list of things to do. Already he could feel how dry his throat was. Then he would have to take stock of the shack, see where he could relieve himself and if there was anything to make him survive the Winter. The windows showed only white outside. Going by Nathan's usual luck he was probably snowed-in, trapped in this place with a wolf and without a horse to call his own anymore. He was, for all intents and purposes, stranded here for the time being. With a bit of black humor he thought that at least the wolf wasn't going to go hungry, if push came to shove. It wasn't a particularly comforting thought.

But if he didn't find enough food it wasn’t going to matter. He was going to die here either way.

Nathan wiped dust from one of the window panels and looked outside again, peering over the top of the snow that had piled up on the windowsill outside. The storm seemed to have passed for now. It had swept up banks of snow that looked to be a few feet deep, out in the yard. Low enough that he could get the door open, he thought, eying the hinges. It swung inward, but he was still going to be trapped unless he mowed a way through the white blanket covering the ground. Then he looked around inside a second time. Now that Winter was here and seemed to have decided to stay, there was no hurry to get anywhere, especially without a horse or a carriage.

A few books were piled on a shelf, along with a single set of simple cutlery and plate and bowl. Whoever had lived here seemed to have done so alone. Here, too, the dust covered everything. Most likely it had been a hunter. Evidence of _that_ hung on the walls. Certainly explained why he lived alone in the woods, instead of out on the plains where you could at least be a farmer or hunt bison, plant some crops and keep a few animals. There were a lot of different furs thrown across the bed, which was more of a cot. 

He wandered around the shack and did it again, just to have something to do, puttering around and pulling out a wooden bucket when he found one. Over the fire hung a kettle that had seen better days. 

Usually, Nathan spent his winters with other people. Last year he'd been with Chloe and her gang. It had been nice. A smile spread over his face. Very nice. They hadn’t left the bed for days, even though Charlie and Sully had teased them mercilessly about it. He brought the bucket over to the door when a floorboard made a hollow sound underneath his boot. 

Nathan stopped. Huh. Something felt weird underneath his boots, beyond the sound. A glance showed the wolf looking at him with interest, especially when Nathan put his weight from foot to foot experimentally and the wooden planks creaked again. Maybe it was an entertaining noise to the wolf. Or something. Huh, Nathan thought again. In and of itself that was not unusual, he supposed. The shack was old, hadn’t been used in a while. Who knew how much maintenance had gone into it. Even the rug underneath his feet was threadbare. 

After a moment, Nathan knelt. On closer inspection, it was a rather thin rug, not heavy, and worn through in places. He pulled it to the side.

His heart skipped a beat at what he found underneath. A trapdoor, well kept from the look of it. Dust hadn't settled here and there was no rust on the hinges when he inspected them. He looked at it for a while. All in all it was just your regular trap door. What was more interesting was: What was hidden underneath?

Experimentally Nathan pulled at the handle and let out a little delighted laugh when it swung open. It wasn't locked. His mind supplied him with an image of a secret passage, but what he found instead was, possibly, even better. It was a rather big hole in the ground, a room deep enough that there was a ladder attached to one side. Shelves graced the other three and those were filled to the brim with supplies.

"Jackpot!", Nathan said and lifted his head to grin at the wolf, which let out a yip in answer to Nathan's happiness. His day was shaping up to be his Lucky Day after all, if you could ignore the fact that he was trapped in a shack somewhere in a forest he didn't know the layout of at the beginning of what looked to be a cold, cold winter. Supplies were a very good start into the morning though. It meant one less thing to worry about for a while, judging by the amount that had been hoarded. 

He looked back at the wolf. "Did you know this was going to be here?"

The wolf just looked back at him steadily and tilted its head after a while. There was no recognition on its face. Nothing that would have suggested that he knew what Nathan was saying. If he had to be honest, Nathan hadn't really expected there to be any.

Nathan crouched and read some of the labels from his vantage point. Mostly the storage consisted of canned goods, jars of pickled vegetables and fruit and jerky. But there were even some potatoes, which were in surprisingly good shape. Whoever had lived here couldn't have been missing for that long after all. Not that the dust hadn't been an indication already. Could have been a week or longer. Maybe a month? Nathan had never been good at telling just how much time had passed. Outside he could track decently enough.

Nathan wondered what had happened to the previous owner. Maybe the wolf have killed them. But on the other hand, the wolf had made no move to attack him at all. In fact, it had lead him to the shack. That wasn't the behavior of a blood-thirsty monster, unless the wolf had only brought him back here to open the trapdoor for him.

At that thought, Nathan raised his head and looked at the wolf. He only got a head tilt in return. Yeah that was quite unlikely.

The wolf padded closer at his attention and nudged his head against Nathan's shoulder. Its tongue lolled out of its snout when Nathan reached up to pet its neck.

"Oh yeah, you're a real blood-thirsty monster, aren't you?" Nathan said. The last of his tension seeped out of his shoulders. Then he cleared his throat. The thirst was getting too hard to ignore. 

"Time to get some water. Do you need anything, wolf?" Nathan asked conversationally and got to his feet. His bladder was making itself known as well. The toilet was probably outside. Only big mansions could afford one that was inside.

"Better get a thicker jacket before going out," Nathan rambled to himself. One of the drawers yielded one made of leather and lined with fur, seams uneven. It was too big on Nathan, but warmer than anything he had worn in a while. Then he picked up the bucket and opened the door. Faintly he could make out the privy in the back of the yard, covered in white. The snow in front of it was undisturbed. 

Nathan wondered if he was going to find a corpse soon. With any of his usual luck he was going to find the previous owner of the shack in the privy. And it was going to be fresh. He could deal with bones, it was the days old corpses he had problems with.

"Any ideas where your owner is?" Nathan said, turning to the wolf. It only yipped in answer and went back to lie down in front of the fireplace. Cold was seeping into the room.

"Great help you are," Nathan muttered. The snow was lying not as high yet as it could be after the sudden snowstorm the night before. It only reached his ankle when Nathan stepped out and closed the door behind him without latching it.

Nathan eyed the privy at the end of the yard. Then he looked at the shack again. Seeing the wall lined with cut wood made him let out a sigh of relief. Cutting wood wasn't his favorite past time, but neither was freezing to death. At the end of the yard some logs were piled up. It was enough to last him through the winter. There was even some coal, now wet and chilled. If he brought them inside he could use them in his fire during the night. 

"Alright, I can make it," Nathan muttered. A small smile pulled at his lips. It was shaping up to be a less dire situation than he would have expected, after he had fallen off his horse. Now boredom may be his only problem for the next few months. And his bladder. 

The cold was biting at his skin, but soon Nathan reached the little house. Inside, spiders had made their home. There was no corpse, much to his fortune.

Spiders topped corpses even if he hated the former as well. Nathan stopped for a moment, locking gazes with a particularly big and black one. He shuddered. Then he broke off a branch from a nearby tree, scratching his hand on accident and broke the webs and chased the spiders out, throwing the branch far away from him and hopping from foot to foot when one of the spiders headed towards him on it. There was no doubt in his mind that they were going to be back by the next time he was going to come out here, but for now he quite liked them _not_ being in there _with_ him.

"Fucking spiders!" Nathan growled and quickly relieved himself, uncomfortable with the cold creeping into every nook and cranny of his clothes and wrapping around his exposed cock. 

Sam would have kept him warm. Well, not on the privy of course. They had never been _that_ close, no matter Nathan's secret fantasies about the matter. But they could have wrapped themselves in all the clothes they had and waited it out, huddling in bed. They would have made up stories and gathered as much food as they could. Then they would have waited. Winter had to end sometime after all. 

Nathan's heart ached at the memory. Fifteen years had passed since they had last spend a Winter that way. 

But now Nathan was here, with his pants down, without his brother and this particular Winter had set in too quickly and suddenly for him to reach the next village. One year after his brother's disappearance he had spend a Winter alone. It had nearly killed him. It had left him off-balance. Now all he had was a wolf. 

He would have spend this year in his own home, if it hadn't been ransacked by robbers while he had been gone, held up in a prison, thanks to his dear _friend_ Harry Flynn. There had been no way for him to gather enough supplies, but his last heist had left him with some money and _in a fucking village he could have lasted a winter_. Maybe. Hopefully. He would have worked and helped out at least and earned his keep. There were some villagers who took in strangers and had enough food to spare for the right amount of coin for the spring that was coming.

If he rationed, the supplies in the makeshift cellar could last, but there was his companion to think of as well. How much did a wolf eat again?

Once Nathan was done, he closed the door behind him and stumbled back through the snow to the shack, calculating the days in his head. On the way, he filled the bucket with snow and only when he looked up did he notice the other side of the house. There was a stable, which, upon closer inspection, was filled with hay, but unfortunately lacked a horse. Beside it was a well. Later he could get water up from it, but for now the snow would do.

The wolf looked up when he entered. Its ears swiveled into his direction, but then it laid its head down on its paws again. Remarkable, Nathan thought, that he could just share a shack with a wolf. It must have lived with humans since it was a pup and now was tame, like a dog. Whatever it was, it seemed friendly enough. And everything that didn't try to actively kill him was fine with Nathan. Sam had always teased him about his love for animals. Once he said that Nathan was going to try and pet anything that wasn't gone quickly enough. 

The memory made Nathan smile. Good-natured teasing had been the norm for them, just like the fact that Sam was always going to do what was best for Nathan. Or at least what he thought what was best for Nathan. His smile dropped from his face. Yeah, so much for that. 

Nathan closed the door behind him and latched it. Then he stripped out of the jacket, hung it by the entry and melted the snow in the kettle over the fire. When he had quenched his thirst, he crawled under the covers of the cot. It smelled musty, not used for a while. After a few minutes, the wolf moved closer and laid down on the ground beside him.

 

The next day he woke up with a stuffed nose. At least his chest didn't ache, which was only a small comfort when you had trouble breathing.

"Fantastic," Nathan groused. Figured that a stint in a snowstorm and almost freezing to death would have that effect. The wolf raised its head from its place by the fire as Nathan coughed. Then it came over to him and bumped his snout against his palm. Quickly, Nathan pulled his arm back against his chest, before his memories reminded him that he wasn't scared of it anymore, but by then the wolf had huffed and turned on its foot, or paw, and walked back to lay down in front of the fire, tail raised high.

"Sorry," Nathan croaked. Then, "huh, you're a boy." Not that it truly mattered to know that. Nathan's mind felt leaden. He closed his eyes again.

After another hour, Nathan dragged himself out of bed. First, he checked on the fire he had so stupidly forgotten to bank or feed, but surprisingly enough, it was still going, keeping the room warm enough that he could walk around on only his socks. Nathan still got dressed and shuffled out to relieve himself. If his illness was going to get worse, he would have to use a bucket. On second thought, he took a bucket with him outside. After he was done, he brought in another load of snow and melted it over the fire. Then he brought in wood from the pile outside. When the most essential things were done he let himself fall back into the bed, ate and drank and then was out like a light again with the wolf keeping watch over him.

He woke up again when something wet touched his throat. With a gasp Nathan jerked backwards. The wolf was right in front of his face, illuminated by the fireplace. Outside, night had come. It was staring at Nathan, but Nathan didn't have it in him to care, since his limbs were shaking and he felt weak. Still he managed to get to trembling feet and check on the fire. Don't let the fire go out, had been ingrained into his mind ever since he was born. Don't let the fire go out in winter. When it had still been Sam and him they had taken turns.

Despite the fact that he hadn't stoked it it was still burning, so Nathan stumbled back to the bed and crawled underneath the sheets and furs. After a moment, the wolf jumped up on the bed and laid down across his legs.  
It watched Nathan until Nathan's eyes slipped shut on their own accord. Only then did the wolf lay down his head as well and go to sleep.

Towards dawn the fever broke.

 

That morning, Nathan could already get up again without having to fear to collapse out of sheer exhaustion.

"Do you have to follow me everywhere?", he rasped. His voice was nearly gone and everything on his face and in his head hurt. "We don't even know each other," Nathan joked.

The wolf gave him a Look and whined, pressing against his legs and looking up at him. Maybe it was just desperate for attention and petting. Sully had had a dog once just like this. Initially bought as a watchdog for his new saloon it had suckered up to everyone coming through the door. It had been a lousy watchdog, but the sweetest creature that Nathan had ever met. And now this wolf was possibly, too.

All day it didn't sway from his side, except to do its business and possibly hunt. The day after was the same and the one after that, until Nathan was feeling healthy again. At least through this stint his supply of food hadn't declined all that much. Most of the time he had slept and had only been forced to eat when his body demanded it. The most important had been to drink and it had taken all his strength to keep the kettle filled with water. But, he noticed when he could use his brain for thinking again, the pile of wood was declining. The fire hadn't gone out once, even though there had been moments he had forced himself out of bed to check it and to melt more snow to drink. At the time he had been too ill to wonder. Now he did. Maybe I sleep-walked, Nathan thought and a tiny part of his mind added: 'Maybe you have a ghost watching over you after all.' The thought didn’t make him feel better. There weren't many ghosts who could watch over him.

The wolf made a noise and Nathan felt his weight against his side again. Unconsciously, he let his hand drop to the scruff of his neck.

 

"What do you think, want to take a walk in the woods?", Nathan asked a few weeks later. After being locked up in here for so long he was almost desperate to finally get out for a while. The shack wasn't big enough to offer a lot of space for moving as much as he _wanted_ to. He had read the slim collection of books the shack had to offer, including an almanac on hunting. He had worked out. He had made notes and drawings in a notebook he had found, since his own one had been lost, trying to recollect everything he knew about the treasure he had been after. His days had been filled, but he needed to get _out_. 

The wolf nudged against his leg, tail wagging.

"Good idea, huh?" Nathan asked and petted the wolf. He had yet to name it. So far he only called it 'wolf'. Briefly he had thought of naming it 'Sam', but that seemed wrong. 

The wolf yipped its consent. Another wash was in order as well. Alone, Nathan kept exposing himself to the air to a minimum, despite the warmth of the fire. Getting snow in from outside for drinking purposes was tedious enough, more so if he added washing to the list. But he started to _smell_ himself again, not to talk of his clothes. Luckily, the wolf didn't care, but Nathan wasn't going to wait until it turned up its snout at him.

Nathan looked outside. The snow had lessened a bit, or at least there was nothing new coming down. For once. Time to seize the day before there was another snowstorm. He felt sick of jerky and canned soup had started to taste like nothing.

"Do you know if there is a lake around here?", Nathan said casually while putting on the warm winter clothes he had liberated from the previous owner of the shack. The wolf barked, which Nathan was going to take as an affirmation. "You know," he started casually, "my brother Sam taught me how to break the ice and fish. Maybe we'll get some fresh meat on the table." When Nathan checked for its reaction, the wolf was looking at something in the corner of the room. Maybe there had been a mouse or something. Nathan shrugged and started rummaging through drawers for string and something to use as a hook and bait. A man living by himself in the woods close to a lake had to have something like that. While Nathan had looked around the shack, he hadn't looked at everything in that much detail, although boredom would have driven him to it sooner or later. It just _felt wrong_ to go through someone's stuff, if there was at least a tiny chance that they could return. Something else entirely was it to go through ruins of people dead for hundreds of years.

He had started playing cards by himself. It was only exciting up to a point.

In one of the drawers, hidden underneath some loose religious pamphlets, Nathan found a hook and line. With a small noise of triumph, he pushed the paper to the side and froze when his fingers brushed against a lighter. 

It was painfully familiar.

"Sam?", Nathan whispered. The wolf brushed against his legs and whined at the hitch in his voice. Nathan picked up the lighter. It was worn and looked just like the one Sam had always used. Or maybe his mind was playing tricks on him. It wasn't like it had been unique, a birthday gift that Nathan had gotten his brother. 

Line and hook forgotten, Nathan tore through the shack again, suddenly desperate and boredom completely forgotten. 

He must have missed something crucial! There had been a _reason_ why he had come out here. Fifteen years ago Sam had disappeared in this area and it hadn't even crossed Nathan mind that _Sam_ could have been the previous owner of this god-forsaken cottage. 

At the bottom of a trunk, tucked in a corner and disregarded by Nathan because it was filled with _junk_ , he found a jacket, one that looked just like Sam had worn. A denim jacket he had stolen after the fabric had become popular. With a certain amount of frantic searching Nathan found Sam's initials stitched into the inner side of it. His original initials, before they had changed their names.

"My brother was here," Nathan whispered and flung out a hand to steady himself against the wall when his knees grew weak. The wolf pressed against his side, whimpering, but he ignored it. 

At some point Sam had been here. Or maybe this had been Sam's shack. He missed him. Suddenly the fact that the cottage was deserted after it had been so painstakingly filled with supplies and woods didn't seem as fortunate to Nathan anymore.

"Oh no," Nathan whispered. There had been dust here. Whoever had lived here had been gone. If Sam had been here he was gone. The shack had been prepared for someone's return who never made it back. The thought ran up and down in his mind, circling back and repeating.

The wolf nudged his hand. "Guess we'll go to the lake later," Nathan said weakly, voice breaking. He stumbled over to another drawer. During the first week of his stay, he had found journals. He had put them away, unwilling to break the privacy of another person so easily and besides, he hadn't _thought_ it would be of interest to him. The journals of some hunter in the woods. How interesting could those be?

Turned out he should have read them. If it had been of use, Nathan would have liked to bash his head against the wall.

The wolf followed him when he brought them over to the bed and began reading.

 

The first journal was a waste. Nathan picked up the second one. 

By the fifth, dated fifteen years back, Nathan perked up.

 

A few hours later he felt tenser than when he had started. The journals painted a picture that Nathan didn't like at all. 

His brother had been here, somewhere, but he hadn't lived in the shack. Nathan had gone back years through the journals and thanked the writer with every fiber of his heart that they had lived here for so long and had written down everything so meticulously. The man who had lived here for the last decades had found his brother's clothes somewhere out in the forest near something he called 'the Ruins', but no body. There was even a mention of the wolf, but Nathan dismissed it. It made Nathan's body thrum in a way he usually associated with chasing after some ancient treasures. 

And now he felt like he was back on Sam's trail. Not only on Sam's though. 'Ruins' could be an indication for what he had searched for _with_ Sam. He almost couldn't appreciate it. Not with the prospect of having some evidence of what had happened to his brother.

Nathan felt his eyes burn.

Why had Sam left his clothes behind? Who had forced him to undress? The date was back fifteen years. Nathan slumped. Fifteen years. Whatever had happened to Sam had happened so long ago that it was unlikely that Nathan was truly going to pick up a trail again, but maybe he could take a look at those ruins. Sam had been there, but he hadn't returned. Even if Nathan was going to find his bones he _was_ going to find him.

All he had to do was to wait for Spring. Nathan rubbed a hand over his face. Maybe somewhere out there his brother's bones were buried underneath the snow. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes. The wolf jumped up on the bed and settled against him. It was a comfort. Winter was best spent with people, but Nathan was alone. The wolf nipped his shoulder and Nathan startled out of his depressed thoughts.

"What?", Nathan asked. The wolf growled in answer.

"Alright, fine, no moping. We'll just go fishing now," Nathan said, heart heavy. Distraction. He needed a distraction. He snatched up the line and hook he had all but forgotten about when finding Sam's lighter, as well as some left-over jerky, an axe, knife and his rifle, and went out.

 

Once outside, he looked around. Nathan had no actual idea where the lake was, but when the wolf set off into a direction he followed, memorizing the way as he went.

At least the skies were clear where Nathan could see flashes of it through the trees and the forest was white. Around his feet the snow had piled up to reach the middle of his calf. Going forward was difficult and within minutes Nathan was chilled to the bone. He should have stayed back in the shack, but-  
No, he couldn't, not after what he had found. Going out to fish was as good an excuse as any. He'd been holed up long enough and a quick stint out wouldn't hurt.

Occasionally, the wolf looked back at him as if to check he was sill there.

"I really hope you're leading me to a lake. Otherwise this is going to be awkward," Nathan told him, trying and failing to keep his voice light. Forcibly, he tore his thoughts away from Sam.

 

The wolf did lead him to a lake. Nathan saw a glimpse of it through the trees and by the time they arrived his skin felt chilled all over. He wouldn't stay long, Nathan promised himself. Just along to get some fish, if he was lucky, and then he would head back. He kept an eye on the sky. There was still some hours of light to go and still time until he was in danger of freezing. 

No lean-tos littering the ice that he had come to expect from other places he'd been to. In more populated areas they were built on the ice on the water froze. Nathan had seen them so often in recent years, that the absence threw him off-balance, just another reminder that he was _alone_. Indeed there was only a single one at the end of a long pier. The wood creaked worryingly under his feet, but held. The guy from the shack probably hadn't spend as much time maintaining it as he should have, if his journals were any indication.

Probably didn't have the time, Nathan thought to himself. 

"Alright," Nathan said out loud when they hunkered down in the safety of the wooden walls, out of the wind. There was a boat in here, too. The back was open and a hole was let into the floor. Underneath was ice that Nathan hacked away at with the axe he had brought with him. Now, worms would have been better for fishing, but he wasn't going to dig into frozen ground for that. Instead he fixed some bread on the hook and dropped it into the water, holding onto the line.

"This is kind of nice," Nathan told the wolf, who only gave him a look and laid down beside him. "Hey, we're out of the wind and tonight I can fix us up some nice fish."

The wolf huffed.

Nathan looked out of the open back. The boat was frozen to the water. Almost a month out here and everything was frozen solid and covered in a white blanket. After a while, Nathan was almost dozing, the line jerked and Nathan pulled at it, slowly like Sam had taught him.

"Hah! We got one," he said. The wolf raised his head and looked in, gaze fixed on the hole. The fish thrashed, spraying water, but soon Nathan had it out and quickly cut into its throat with his knife. "We got us a nice meal!"

The wolf let out a yip. "Yeah, we'll have something nice to eat. I can't wait!" Nathan crowed and shook the wolf excitedly by the scruff of its neck, making it growl. Quickly he let it go.

Then the wolf yipped again and Nathan raised his head. Out on the lake was a herd of deer.

"Jackpot!", Nathan whispered to the wolf, "tonight we'll have a feast." He reached for his rifle. They were too far away, but the ice was thick. He just had to make sure they didn't see him before he could take a shot.

Nathan raised a hand, checking the wind. It stood in his favor. The herd wasn't going to smell him if he was careful, so he crept towards them with the wolf at his heels. 

Underneath his feet the ice creaked dangerously, but Nathan gave it no mind. If it was thick enough to hold a herd of deer, it was thick enough to hold a single man. Behind him, the wolf was silent. Then it let out a soft whimper, but Nathan ignored it. Instead he raised his rifle and took aim. His breath was shallow. In the cold his hands were trembling.

If he could take down a deer, they'd be set for another few weeks on top of the leftover supplies. They would have _choices_ of what to eat, even if he had to salt the meat. Maybe with the fireplace he could dry a bit of it, too.

One of the deer staggered as the shot rang out over the lake. The rest of the herd sprang apart at the noise and Nathan let out a whoop of joy. Behind him, a warning growl of the wolf was drowned out by the sudden crack of ice at his feet.

"Crap," Nathan shouted out, but it was already too late. He staggered as the ice underneath him broke away, too quickly for him to jump towards steadier ground. Ahead of him the carcass of the deer he had shot was swallowed by the lake. Water closed over his head and he could hear the wolf _howl_. 

The cold stole his breath. He was too stupefied to let go of the rifle. It got into his way as he fought his way up towards the surface, his clothes dragging him down.

Sputtering, his head broke the surface again and he scrambled on ice that broke underneath his arms, dropping him back into the freezing water. Nathan was too cold to even curse. He didn't feel like there was any air left in his long when he finally got a grip. For once the ice didn't splinter and he kicked his feet, dragging himself painstakingly slowly forward while the surface underneath him creaked and groaned, but held. Then sharp fangs buried in the nape of his jacket. His vision was filled with the wolf's paws.

"N-no, g-go b-ack," Nathan stuttered out. His teeth were chattering hard enough that he feared _they_ were going to splinter, too. Of course the wolf didn't listen, only growled around the fabric in its muzzle as it dragged Nathan forward until Nathan's legs cleared the water. The ice was cracking dangerously underneath their shared weight. Fine fissures appearing and spreading out. 

Nathan's mind was blank from shock and cold as he was half-dragged, half-crawled, over the ice until there was actual snow under his hands. A moment, he lay there, shaking all over until the wolf growled close to his ear and survival instinct kicked in. 

The first time he tried getting to his feet he slipped and fell. His clothes were freezing in the cold, growing stiff. He couldn't even feel scared when the wolf snapped at his feet and legs, trying to get him to _move_.

Then Nathan managed to take control of his limbs again and he stumbled forward, tried to remain upright or at least nearly so as he stumbled. The wolf was running all around him, pressing against his side from this way and that and pushing him into the right direction. Nathan felt as if he was a sheep that was being shepherded home. He let out a weep of relief when he finally caught a glimpse of the shack ahead. His body hurt as if knives were being pushed through his skin.

Nathan's hands fumbled uselessly at the door before pushing it open, remembering that he hadn't locked it. For the first time in his life he thanked himself for his carelessness. Inside, the fire had burned down, but it was still _burning_. Nathan hurried to get out of his jacket with limbs that weren't obeying him. The wolf ripped his shirt when his fangs clamped down and _tore_.

"F-Fuck, s-stop!" Nathan wept. He fell to his knees with the force of the wolf's pull, which growled at him and snapped at his feet again, dragging his shoes off. The warmth of the glowing embers washed over Nathan's bare torso, followed by the sensation of a hundred tiny needles. It was agony, getting his pants off. They were frozen stiff and his fingers didn't do what he told them to. They were shaking too much. The wolf in his hurry, bit his ankle to get his teeth into the hem of his pants.

"Stop!" Nathan cried out again and the wolf shied away. It whimpered softly and its muzzle pressed against Nathan's hand. Blood was welling up from Nathan's ankle, but Nathan ignored it in favor of painstakingly rolling his pants down his frozen legs, letting out pained whimpers of his own and wishing for a familiar pair of hands to help him, soothe his pain.

Then he curled in towards the fireplace and it was only the wolf's teeth dragging over his shoulder without hurting him that stopped him before he could roll _into_ it. Nathan cursed.

"Sorry, s-sorry," Nathan mumbled and laid shaking. Distantly he was aware that he should get up, stoke the fire. The embers' heat washed over his front and left his back to freeze. The ground was so hard underneath him, but he couldn't bring himself to move. Behind him, the wolf trotted away and Nathan curled farther into himself. If he had had the strength he would have called to the wolf to come back. He was so cold. He couldn't remember ever being so cold and so damn unlucky. Even the storm that had brought him here had seemed almost warm in comparison.

A nose nudged him, a log was dropped beside him and the wolf moved away as Nathan pushed himself to his feet on shaking arms. Nathan hissed as he threw the wood onto the fireplace and sparks swirled up, burning his skin and leaving blisters. Quickly he pulled his hand away, while the log caught fire.  
Another few logs dropped beside him and were put into the flames. 

Nathan's eyes were drooping. The shivering had stopped, which worried a tiny corner of his mind. He laid back down.

Then a blanket settled over him and the wolf nosed his way underneath to press its warmth against Nathan's back. With the flames warming his other side, Nathan closed his eyes.

Hours later, or maybe it had only been minutes, Nathan opened his eyes again to the wolf trotting past him and towards the fire with a log held awkwardly in his muzzle. He watched as, carefully, the wolf threw the wood in the crackling flames.

"You're not a normal wolf, aren't you?" Nathan whispered, but he got no answer. A moment later he was out again, missing how the wolf froze.

It was dark outside when Nathan woke once more. The shack was still illuminated by the fireplace, but Nathan couldn't quite place why that surprised him. His thoughts were still fuzzy, slow. The wolf was a warm and reassuring presence against his side. A blanket was wrapped around Nathan. With a thoughtful frown he stroked his hand along the fabric. Had he gotten it from the cot? No, Nathan thought, the wolf had gotten it for him. He could remember half-waking briefly to pull it more securely around himself. 

Nathan felt... surprisingly good, all things considered. For a while he stayed where he was, taking stock of his body. He felt weak and exhausted, no surprise there, but his chest was clear and he didn't feel too hot and neither too cold. The only thing he felt was hunger and thirst. He let out a relieved chuckle. It probably wasn't a good idea to drink while his bladder was so full. He wasn't about to risk peeing himself, so he pushed himself to his feet, taking note of how weak his legs felt and how lightheaded he was.

"Better not overdo it," Nathan mumbled to himself. 

Living in a stranger's shack once more proved to be a blessing, even if the rest of the situation was far from it. There was the good ol' dresser, so Nathan dressed himself after finding his own clothes to still be wet from his little swim. The garments of the previous owner smelled unpleasant, old and musty, but they were clean as far as he could tell in the low light of the fire. Even if they hadn't been he would have worn them, anything to be less chilled without his blanket.

Before going outside, he put his boots in front of the fire and spread his clothes out across the furniture, where the outspread warmth of the fire would dry them quickly. Wearing a dead man's clothes, or a missing one's, wasn't the best of feelings.

Once upon the time, Sam had let him wear his clothes occasionally or had given him his hand-me-downs. Nathan had always enjoyed being surrounded by his brother's scent.

He shook the memory away, even while he tried to remember where he had left the jacket he had found. After fifteen years it wasn't going to smell like Sam anyway.

When Nathan made for the door, the wolf got up.

"Want to keep an eye on me?" Nathan asked and to his surprise the wolf nodded. "Huh." Nathan shook his head. He must have a fever after all, hallucinate. Nonetheless he went outside with the wolf at his heels, trudging through the snow in boots too big and wishing he had wrapped the blanket around him still. He shut the door of the privy in front of its muzzle and did his business with only once having to steady himself against the wooden walls.

The wolf was waiting obediently in front of the door when Nathan stepped out and followed him just as closely back to the shack. Nathan was glad not to be alone.

 

Another week passed in boredom, regaining his strengths in bed and using the time to go through the journal of fifteen years ago, looking for clues about his brother. Then, when Nathan's notebook was filling up, he got out his deck of cards again and started playing against himself. 

The wolf crept up to him and sat down beside him to watch him play, leaning against him. Once Spring came around Nathan really hoped it was going to come with him. Sully was going to adore it, he was sure. Its gaze was fixed on Nathan's hands.

"Pretty boring, huh?" Nathan said. The wolf raised its eyes and gave him a steady look in return. Considering the shape of his companion, Nathan wasn't really surprised. It wasn't like the wolf could talk. 

"Want to play?" Nathan jokingly asked and let out a startled laugh when the wolf moved away from where it had pressed against his side to sit opposite of him. This time, the expression it turned in Nathan's direction was earnest. Its tongue lolled out of its muzzle.

"Do you even know how Poker works? Do you even know what cards are?"

The wolf yipped. Its face looked almost offended. Nathan laughed and shuffled the cards.

"There is the matter of not having hands," he pointed out. "I used to play so much cards with my brother. He taught me poker." His hands stilled and the wolf moved around him to press against his side once more. Nathan reached up to pet it, laying the cards on the grounds.

"Sam had a great poker face, but Sully has a better one," Nathan confided. "I miss the old guy." At least he was still alive, a tiny part of him whispered. But he still missed Sam the most. 

A nip on his arm brought him back to the present. "Ow," he said and the wolf nipped him again. It hadn't hurt at all, but Nathan still playfully pushed it away only for it to scoot back against his side again. 

"Alright, wise guy," he said, smiling, and laid out a cards. He felt more than a little silly when he started to explain Solitaire to a wolf, but on the other hand... at least it was entertaining. The wolf's eyes followed each move of his hand as it went through the game. Then, as he stared down at the cards, looking for his next move, the wolf touched its nose against a card. Nathan stared for a moment.

"Good choice." Nathan picked up the card, transferring it to the right place. They played for a while and the wolf pointed cards out to him.

"You're way too smart for a simple animal," Nathan mused, "you must be some kind of wonder dog." Excitedly, he gestured with his hands. The possibilities were endless!

A low growl emitted from the wolf's throat. Nathan dropped his hands back to his lap. Then he picked up the cards again, putting them back into their deck.

"Wonder wolf I mean," Nathan corrected himself with a smile. "You know, I used to do magic tricks when I was young," he continued conversationally. "What do you say? Nate the Great and his Wonder Wolf. Sounds good, doesn't it?"

The wolf let its tongue loll out of its snout and wagged its tail. "Sounds good, yeah." Nathan patted the wolf, which leaned into his touch.

"Yeah, I love you, too," Nathan told it and ducked away when the wolf tried to lick his face in answer. He wasn't quite quick enough. "Can you count, too?" Nathan asked when he had pried the overexcited wolf off of him with a laugh and wiped the saliva off his face.

This time the wolf tilted its head to the side, back to its obedient self. 

"Count to, let's say, three. Three barks you can do, right?" 

After a moment's hesitation that made Nathan doubt the wisdom of his actions, the wolf obediently let out three barks in quick succession.

Nathan laughed again. "Great! As soon as this Winter is over we can get the show on the road. Let's see how high you can count. What's 10?"

The wolf barked nine times, then hesitated and let out another singular bark.

Thoroughly impressed, Nathan found himself clapping. "Now mathematics. One plus one is?"

It seemed to him almost as if the wolf rolled its eyes, but then it barked two times.

"What about ten plus thirty, divided by three, multiplied by five?"

The wolf growled and Nathan guffawed, raising his hands in surrender when the wolf pounced.

 

"Hey, do I stink?" Nathan asked the shack at large a few days later. He had _meant_ to pet the wolf, but once he had moved closer the wolf had turned up his nose. Much to his surprise, it rather hurt to have his only companion promptly moved away. Experimentally, Nathan sniffed his armpit and recoiled. "Alright," he told the wolf, "you may have a point."

Reluctantly, he rolled to his feet from the bed and grabbed the bucket. A quick trip outside filled it with snow, freshly fallen throughout the night, which he melted in the big kettle over the fire. Once it was warmer, he could get water from a nearby well he had found only a few days ago, but for now snow was enough. When the water was boiling, he brought in another bucket full of snow, melted that as well and poured both into the washbasin. It wasn't much. With the grime that layered his skin he probably needed a real bath in the lake or some nearby river, but since he wasn't going to take _another_ swim in an icy lake, that was out of the question. 

The wolf watched him work. 

"You know, you should really help me, lazy pants," Nathan scoffed when he lugged the kettle back to the fire.

At least the fire held the cottage nice and warm. It had its upsides to have such a small place, even if technically it wasn't his. He placed the chair in front of the basin and Nathan felt the wolf's eyes on him as he stripped off his shirt and started cleaning his chest with a clean rag and soap. The water ran dirty quickly, so Nathan eventually put on a clean shirt and his jacket and ventured out again to replace the water. Maybe tomorrow he could clean his clothes, too. 

On the second go, he left his shirt on and only took off his pants, quickly cleaning his legs and groin, then his feet.

"Do I smell better again?" Nathan asked and laughed when the wolf padded over to him, sniffed him and then deigned to lovingly press against his side once more.

"You know what? You're a real diva," Nathan scoffed. Then he grabbed the wolf by the scruff of his neck when it made to leave. "Wait. Now it's your turn."

The wolf huffed in annoyance but didn't fight it when Nathan dipped the rag in the lukewarm water again and started cleaning the wolf's paws. Then he got a brush. The wolf growled at him the first time it snagged in a tangle of his fur.

"Sorry," Nathan murmured and stroked a hand down the wolf's side. It couldn't have been too bad. The wolf leaned into each of his touches. Despite himself, Nathan found himself humming an old song that Sam had used to sing to him after their mother had died, to calm him down. The wolf pressed hard against him, almost toppling him.

"Hey now, careful!" Nathan yelped and scratched the wolf behind its ears. 

By the time he was done two hours later, the wolf's coat was shiny again. 

"Now you're pretty again," Nathan murmured and squinted when a nose touched his cheek and the wolf huffed close to his ear.

 

Another few weeks passed and brought with it new snow and the feeling of being trapped in one place for too long. It almost came as a blessing when Nathan looked down into his sort-of-cellar and counted his supplies. Almost. 

"Shit," Nathan whispered with feeling and the wolf came over to look around his shoulder. Nathan inched up the trapdoor higher to give it a better view. "Supplies are almost gone," he explained and counted the cans and the dried meat again. 

"I mean, we could make it another month, but it's going to get lean," Nathan told the wolf. "And you probably need some fresh meat anyway."

The wolf looked back at him and then into the little room below again. Then it nodded its agreement. Nathan had stopped wondering what kind of wolf this was. It was exceptionally smart, almost human in its mannerism.

"Okay, let's go," Nathan said and bundled himself up in the warmest clothes he could find before grabbing his rifle and his revolver. Outside, the snow was lying in one undisturbed blanket, but close by, beyond the yard there were hoof prints in the snow. He hadn't noticed a herd going past, but then again, he hadn't looked outside in days while the world was cast in white and gray and brown.

"This is going to be our lucky day," Nathan said, voice coming out muffled through the scarf he had wrapped around the lower half of his face. The wolf threw him such a look that Nathan felt compelled to add, "I'll keep away from lakes, alright?" 

They followed the prints, silently. Nathan could only hope that the wind wasn't going to betray them to the deer before they even caught sight of them, but so far it was blowing towards them, not away.

An hour later, the wolf's ears perked up and it scented the air. Then it walked more purposefully. What Nathan had learned to recognize as its regular gait turning into a stalk. Nathan set off after it. After another hour or maybe longer, he caught a glimpse of the herd up ahead. They hadn't noticed them yet, so he had to act quickly. A stag was with them, healthy looking and watchful.

Nathan raised the rifle to his shoulder and took aim while the wolf disappeared between the trees. Maybe it wanted to make its own kill and gorge himself today. Nathan took his time picking his target, a young deer among the group. There weren't many bullets and as soon as the herd was running his chances were lessened to make a killing shot.

The shot rang out clear through the forest and the herd took off, leaving only one body lying on the ground. Nathan let out a crow of triumph and quickly stifled it again. It didn't do to pull attention towards himself in a forest he didn't know. Anything could be creeping about, especially wolves and bears that were going to be hungry now. He moved towards the felled deer. It had been a clean shot, giving it a quick death and Nathan thanked Sam in his mind for having taught him how to shoot and Sully for refining his skills.

Fortunately for him, the deer was just about the right size to carry. He looked around for the wolf just as a pained howl split the air.

"Fuck," Nathan whispered to himself. That sounded quite like _his_ wolf. Quickly he pulled the deer over his shoulder and set off running towards the sound.

By the time he arrived, the wolf had quieted down to pained whimpering. It snapped angrily at Nathan when he tried to get close and Nathan stumbled back, out of reach. There was blood coloring the snow by the wolf's leg, ensnared in the steel trap that had laid hidden below the white and cold blanket.

"Calm down," Nathan whispered, keeping his voice soothing, or at least trying to. With visible effort the wolf quieted, ears flat against its skull. The deer carcass was placed in the snow beside them and Nathan knelt down to inspect the trap. "Alright, we can do it. Just hold still." Luckily, it wasn't a bear trap. Nathan wouldn't have been able to open that one by himself. With a grunt, he pushed down on the springs on either side and the metal clamps slid apart. Someone had modified the trap to have spikes that had driven into the wolf's flesh.

Gingerly, the wolf pulled its paw free and limped a few steps to the side as Nathan let it snap shut again.

"Alright," Nathan said uncertainly. For a moment he thought about reaching out and petting the wolf, but its ears were still flat against its skull. He really hoped there were no further traps hidden among the snow. "Let's go home." He grabbed the deer and followed the wolf as it limped back towards the shack.

Once there, Nathan let the wolf into the room. It curled up on front of the fireplace, trekking blood across the floor. 

"Shit," Nathan cursed and dropped the deer outside, hoping against hope that it wouldn't attract any predators. Later, he would get to the meat, but first he had to take care of his friend. 

The wolf glared when he moved to his side, armed with a few rags and a bowl of warm water. 

"Let me see, please?" Nathan pleaded and after a moment the wolf uncurled grudgingly.

"I wished I knew more about wolves," Nathan admitted while he inspected the injury. It didn't look deep, but it was seeping blood. Nathan couldn't tell if it had hit anything vital, but the wolf had licked it. Gems had to be a problem, right? Nathan cleaned out the wound with the water, before applying pressure with the rag and stroking the wolf's fur with his other hand.

"I'm glad you're not hurt more," Nathan told the wolf, which had relaxed a bit against him. When he was sure the wound had stopped bleeding, Nathan wrapped it in a bandage. It probably wasn't much better, but it made him feel better, like he was doing something for his companion.

For a while he kept petting the wolf. Then he got to his feet. The wolf let out a questioning noise and Nathan scratched it behind the ears.

"Sorry, I'll have to take care of the deer. I don't want it to attract a bear or wolves, no offense."

Then he went out, rifle in hand. No predator had made off with the carcass, but Nathan still slung the deer back over his shoulder and moved far enough away from the house to not attract any bears towards them. At least he hoped so. He knelt and stripped off the hide with his knife. Maybe he could get it cleaned up. He cut off as much meat as he could. The deer had been on the lean side, so there wasn't as much as he would have preferred that he could carry back to his and the wolf's home. He left the bones there. Let some predator pick it clean.

The wolf was curled up on Nathan's bed when he came in and lifted its head when Nathan put the meat and skin on a dresser to be processed. It watched as Nathan laid everything out and began salting some of the meat and put it in the jars he had emptied throughout the last few weeks. He made stew with the rest of it. Afterward he started cleaning the deer hide. It took hours, but after a while the wolf limped over to rest against his thigh. Nathan broke the silence with stories of his exploits, his friends. He wondered how they were doing.

He hoped they were safe.

 

That night, Nathan woke to a noise outside. There was still stew bubbling gentling over the fire and filled the room with its delicious smell. He pricked his ears, sitting up, and on the floor in front of the fireplace, the wolf did the same. There were voices, talking quietly with each other, but not quite quietly enough. 

"Crap," Nathan whispered. 

Silently, he slipped to his feet and took out his revolver, checking the chamber. Suddenly he was once again thankful that Sam had ingrained it into him to always keep it clean and working. It had been a bother during his childhood and after it had been a necessity with them always being on the run.

He had kept it loaded, just in case. These people didn't sound friendly and if they were they would have knocked already. Nathan crept over to the door. Each night he closed the window shutters and now that paid of. At least that way no one could look into the shack from outside. Only the chimney was betraying his presence. That and the fresh blood tracks outside.

Abruptly, the voices ceased, but Nathan could hear the crunching of snow underneath boots when he concentrated and those were headed for the door. Crap, they had probably heard Nathan in the forest and followed the trail of blood the wolf and the deer carcass had left. How long had they watched his house, trying to determine how many people lived here. One man and his wolf wasn't much of a threat, but they had food which was sought after in any winter.

Crap, Nathan thought again. The last weeks, _months_ now, had been so uneventful he hadn't wasted a thought on anyone else being around, least of all bandits.

Nathan tensed, got ready beside the door. If they decided to try their luck shooting through the wall he had least wanted it to be over quickly. There was no place to hide here anyway. The wolf was crouched by the fire and Nathan waved at it to get hidden. Instead, the wolf positioned itself on the other side of the door. 

Then there was no more time to get ready as a bang tore through the silence when one of the bandits kicked open the door. The first man storming through the door was blinded through the sudden gloom and the light of the fire and Nathan took him out with the butt of his gun. 

The second man was smarter, hanging back, and Nathan could hear a third, loitering outside and demanding to know what was going on. They didn't seem terribly smart. 

Good. They had probably presumed that Nathan was going to be an easy target, hopelessly outnumbered.

The second man stepped inside and blocked Nathan's swing, but promptly yelled when the wolf sunk fangs into his leg and a moment later he was on the ground as well. The third man took a shot into the dark. Nathan could hear the bullet hit the wall. Stupid of them to try and take him out inside a cottage. There was only one entry and only one person could enter through the door at once.

Nathan moved quickly, shooting the man outside who was a black contrast against the white backdrop of the snow and then stepped outside. The fourth man had made no sound at all. Nathan stared down the barrel of his gun.

The wolf moved quicker than Nathan could react as the man pulled the trigger. Nathan let out a scream when it jumped in front of him just as the man shot. Then things moved almost to quickly for him to react. The last man lay dead on the ground, a bullet through the head while the wolf bled on the snow once more.

"Fuck, don't die on me," Nathan wept and the wolf yipped in pain when Nathan picked it up, staggering under its weight to carry it inside. Quickly, he gathered everything he needed and interchanged the stew with another kettle holding snow and was back at the wolf's side to quench the bleeding. On such close range the bullet had gone through the wolf's body and when Nathan took a deep breath and held it to clear his head, he noticed that it had gone through its shoulder and the blood was not enough for it to have caught anything vital. At least he hoped so.

Nathan bowed his head and cried into the fur and pressed the rag harder against the wounds.

"Fuck, fuck fuck," he whispered, "you’ll live." He took the rag away and inspected the wounds closely. "Those will need stitches though."

The wolf licked his hand weakly when Nathan buried his fingers into the thick fur of its throat. Over the fireplace, the water boiled and Nathan sterilized a needle, cleaned the wound and stitched two bullet holes closed, trying to ignore the way the wolf whimpered in pain. Tears were pricking his own eyes.

"You have the worst luck, wolf," Nathan sniffed, "we must be made for each other." The laugh came out sounding desperate and the wolf nudged Nathan's side when he was done. 

"Bed rest for you for the next week," Nathan said sternly, but his voice came out weak with relief.

His companion was going to fine, it was going to be fine. The more he repeated it to himself, the calmer he felt. But still, his hands took a while to stop their trembling.

Once Nathan had made sure that the wolf was no longer in danger of bleeding out and was made as comfortable as it could in the situation, he went outside and dragged the corpses of the men out into the forest. Let them be a meal to _other_ wolves or a bear. Nathan didn't care. 

Then he went back to the cottage and after another quick check on the wolf began to track. It wasn't particularly hard. The snow showed him the way back to their camp.

It wasn't close, a few hours away, but closer than he had thought, too close for comfort. 

"Huh?" Nathan whispered to himself when he saw the house. They had a house, only a little bigger than his own cottage and the windows were illuminated. He circled it. There were no signs of life coming from inside it, but he still waited. After an hour of watching, he approached the door.

It wasn't locked.

No one was there. 

"Why did you think trying to rob a shack in the woods would be a good idea?" Nathan said aloud when he entered. Fire was crackling in the fireplace and leftover food was still on the table. It looked as if the men had expected to return quickly. What had they done out here? A shack in the woods wasn't bound to have a lot of supplies. 

Four men had come to him and they had thought he was easy picking or they would have left someone at the camp, but there was no one here. It was deserted and now no one was going to return to it. Nathan picked through their things, trying to figure out what they had _wanted_.

They had supplies, which meant that hadn't been what they had been after. Had they been here long? When had they arrived? Most likely they were the reason why the owner of Nathan's shack had not returned. That or he had an accident. In any case his lack of return may have saved Nathan's life.

These men weren't about to complain if Nathan took some of their stuff with him to get through the remainder of the winter. With just a glance he could already see things he could use, but what really caught his eye was the map on the table. He moved over to it, letting the door fall shut behind him and shouldering his rifle. On a closer look, there was a letter as well.

Nathan read surrounded by the belongings of dead man. "Shit," he whispered into the silence. The name signed at the end of the letter was not one he recognized, but-

"Shit," Nathan whispered again and pocketed it along with the map. Everything inside of him told him to leave this place, even though there was no hurry to. He just really rather wanted to be with his companion again, in the cottage that was feeling like a home now.

Before he left, he went through the shelves and dressers and trunks, packing a bag of supplies and everything else that could be useful. Outside, there were four horses standing underneath an overhanging part of the roof that Nathan hadn't seen at first. It sort of looked like half a stable. The horses themselves looked miserable, so Nathan cut two of them loose to take their chances. The other two he left where they were. The night felt warmer now. Maybe it was only Nathan's imagination that made it seem like there was a hint of Spring on the air. 

Once he had gathered everything he would need, Nathan strapped the bags to one of the horses and mounted the other. 

Deep in thought he returned to the wolf. A treasure... he had only returned to this place to find it, get closure after Sam's disappearance. He tried not to think of it as _compensation_. A tiny part of him had hoped... what he had really hoped was to find out what happened to Sam, though. Anything, even if it was a corpse. He had to know what happened to him and why he had left.

Back at his own cottage, he brought the horses into the stable. Nathan hoped that the hay was going to be enough for the rest of Winter. The wolf was sitting in front of the door when he brought the bags in.

"What are you doing out of bed?" Nathan asked sternly and the wolf whined pitifully. "Missed me?" Nathan scratched it behind the ear and then led it back to the bed. The wolf jumped up on it only after some hesitation. Once it was comfortable, as comfortable as you could be without painkillers and a gunshot wound, Nathan sat down on the ground and leaned back against the cot while the wolf sniffled wetly against the side of his neck. Nathan reach back to pet it. Its fur was so soft. 

Everything was coming back and Nathan found himself talking.

"The men who came here, they're bandits. They thought we knew where the treasure is. The last city of Libertalia."

He stopped for a moment to gather himself. It was just a myth, one he had told the wolf before. His mother had wanted to search for it and after her death he and his brother had made it their goal to find it in her memory. Damn much of luck it brought them.

"Some rich guy paid the expedition." Nathan let out a snort and half turned to the wolf, which was watching him with its too keen eyes. He turned away again. "Well, lets just say he should have picked smarter men." Nathan was itching for some alcohol, so he got up and got a bottle out of the bags he had liberated from the bandits. The wolf let out a huff when Nathan took a swing.

"The good thing is, the sponsor won't come here. He's too busy throwing money at the problem so we have all the time in the world," Nathan said with false cheer. His nails picked at the label of the bottle as he continued.

"You know, I came back here to find my brother," he said. He shook his head. "He left, a few years ago. I think it was because of me. I was -so stupid."

The wolf let out a noise and rested its muzzle on Nathan's shoulder. It was like a floodgate had been opened. Nathan couldn't _stop_.

"He probably figured out my feelings for him and decided it was better to leave me behind." He stared into the flames of the fireplace. After all these years the thought still hurt. It couldn't be coincidence. Sam had been at his side for years, since his birth. He couldn't remember a time without Sam and right as he got ready to confess his feelings Sam disappeared?

The wolf let out a small whine, catching on to the pain in his voice. It was probably stupid to talk so much with it. It wasn't like it could really understand him, even if it often seemed that way.

"I came back here to find him and now... I'm so close to the treasure, closer than ever before, but for some reason I just want to leave." Nathan pulled out the map again and the wolf raised its head. 

"Where did we go wrong all those years ago? We had all the clues to Avery's treasure. We were so close."

Nathan startled when the wolf got up and limped to where Nathan had haphazardly stacked the journals. It shuffled through them and then brought one to Nathan. He let it fall into his lap. The last time he had gone through only a few of them, searching for clues about his brother. This one was from twenty years ago.

"You want me to read them?" Nathan asked and took another swing. The last thing he wanted to do right now was to read some hunter's journal. It had been boring enough the first time.

The wolf let out a yip.

"I don't really feel like it." He laid it to the side and a moment later the wolf picked it up and dropped it back into his lap.

Nathan looked at the journal and then at the wolf. Then he sighed. It had this determined expression on it's face. He threw up his hands, slothing a bit of alcohol over his hand and licked it off. The wolf looked away. "Alright!"

It was not the most exciting of reads. The owner of this cottage hadn't lead an exciting life, so Nathan skimmed again, trying to figure out what the wolf wanted from him. Then he came across it. 'Need new supplies. Stocked up on the yellow stuff.' He'd read it before and now it clicked. It wasn't the best of codes by a long shot, but Nathan hadn't even wondered how a man who didn't seem to get out much except to occasionally hunt and with only one small village dozens of miles away, could have so many and _diverse_ supplies. He'd just been happy to not starve to his death.

"So how did you get all that money?" Nathan flipped a few pages and read again, more closely this time. Then he found it, hints to where he had to go and he pulled the map towards him again, getting to his knees. He spread the map out on the floor and got a pencil, making notes. A few hours later there were scribbles and lines and circles on the map and Nathan's heart was beating faster in his chest. Beside him, the wolf's tail was wagging.

"I- this is brilliant. That's why the bandits tried to attack. They knew this guy knew where the treasure was." Nathan jumped to his feet and began to pace. "We'll have to go once the snow has melted. We don't want any guests." He stopped. "But- I should get Sully. A friend. Just in case." In truth he just wanted moral support. Nothing was really going to prepare him for finding his brother's corpse.

Nathan let himself fall onto the bed and pulled out his own journal. As long as the snow was covering any important tracks his hands were bound. His feet whipped nervously, itching to lead him to the treasure.

 

Another few weeks passed, taking care to go past extra slow and driving Nathan almost out of his mind, but the wolf's wounds mended and then, finally, the snow melted and it was time to leave.

"Sully's going to be north of us," Nathan told the wolf while he packed his bags. In the stable the horses were waiting and the wolf was circling him. It stopped in front of him and tilting its head. Nathan gestured. "There's still snow and I know which brothel he likes to stay in during winter times. He's still going to be there. With my horses it won't take long."

He shouldered his bags and lingered only a moment in the doorway, before turning his back on the room. The wolf followed him into the stable where the horses were waiting. They were about as excited to finally get out as Nathan was. He strapped his bags on one of them and lead them out.

"Ready?" 

The wolf wagged its tail and waited until Nathan was mounted before it ran ahead.

They moved through the woods, map guiding their way. Then, after a few hours, the wolf suddenly let out a low whine. It was soft and when Nathan looked back he saw that the wolf was pacing a few yards away, whining softly again and again.

"What's wrong? Come on, we have to hurry if we want to get back with Sully," Nathan said, walking back to the wolf’s side. It was still pacing. "I'm just as excited to find Libertalia as you are, but I'm not going to find my brother's corpse without some backup."

The horses shied when the wolf let out a howl, still pacing, but making no move to follow Nathan.

"Don’t tell me you want to stay after all we’ve been through together?" There was an edge to Nathan’s voice. They were so close to the treasure. He just had to get _Sully_ and now his wolf was changing its mind about coming along?

"Don’t be an ass. Come, follow me."

Nathan urged on his steed and another mournful howl pierced the air. He looked back over his shoulder where the wolf stared at him, ears flat against its head and howled again. The horses were getting nervous, eyes rolling at the sound.

"I don’t have time for your bullshit, you stupid wolf," Nathan hissed. He dismounted and stomped back to the wolf, grabbing the scruff of its neck. It didn’t budge. "What the hell?" Nathan said. It was like the wolf couldn’t move. Experimentally he pulled it into a different direction and it let out a whine as it followed.

"I’m sorry," Nathan said, patting the wolf’s head. "I don’t know what’s wrong." God his eyes were burning. Leaving the wolf behind was the last thing he wanted to do. He wasn't _going_ to just leave it behind. It was his now.

The wolf shook off his hand and then it headed off into a different direction. After a few paces it stopped and looked back at the staring Nathan as if it wanted him to follow.

"What do you want?" Nathan asked and watched as the wolf paced the same few feet a couple of times, looking back at him.

"Yeah, okay, alright. I’ll follow you," Nathan said softly and and got on his horse again. 

The wolf let out what could only be called a sigh.

It was strange, moving into a different direction than he had planned. They were heading back towards the shack but before it could get back into seeing distance the wolf veered left, deeper into the forest.

"Where are you taking me?" Nathan wondered aloud. Of course the wolf gave him no answer, for obvious reasons.

At least it wasn't as cold anymore as they wandered through the forest. Nathan couldn't remember being there, but without snow everything looked different anyway. He checked the state of the sun and his compass, consulted the map. They were headed into the parts of the map that hadn't been explored yet, not even by the bandits.

There was nothing more to say, just to regulate his breathing and follow the wolf as they walked past trees that seemed to stand closer and closer together the farther they walked. The undergrowth was thick and twigs caught in his hair, making Nathan curse.

"We camped here, years ago," Nathan mused aloud and stopped at a big rock. The shape of it was still the same after all these years. Sam and him had build a fire here, so long ago. Since the forest ahead seemed even thicker than the one behind him, he unstrapped only one bag of necessities from the horses and tied them to a nearby tree.

This didn't feel like a particularly friendly part of the forest. It wasn't lived in. Not by people at least. From afar he could make out a herd of deer but they stayed back from the bushes and thicket that blocked the way between the trees and made it almost impossible to go on. The wolf crawled underneath some of them and after a while, when his arm grew tired of hacking at plants with his knife, Nathan did the same.

He cursed when bugs fell from the bushes onto his neck and hair and twigs dragged down his clothed back like fingernails.

Then they could stand once more, the way through the trees clearer again. He really hoped he was going to find the horses again on the way back.

"I know this place," Nathan said. The sun had moved further across the sky, but the tree they stopped in front of looked familiar as well. "I think we were going in circles, years ago." The tree was old. A couple of men could have been able to wrap their arms around if they worked together, but only if. Nathan circled it with the wolf on his heels. Then he knelt when he found what he had been looking for.

He placed his palm over their names that he and his brother had cut into the tree fifteen years ago. The wolf butted his head against his arm.

Nathan wiped a hand over his face and stood. "Something doesn't seem right with this forest," he told the wolf. Last time, they had spent days combing the woods and yet only managed to get right back to where they had started.

The wolf pressed against his leg, almost toppling him and then started to walk again. Nathan marked the passage on his map and followed it.

The trees hadn't grown sparser when they reached the side of a cliff, but the air had grown chillier and Nathan was glad to duck into the cave the wolf entered.

Nathan stopped, letting his eyes adjust to the darkness. He let out a quiet yelp when the wolf bumped into his leg and he reached down to find it holding a torch in his snout.

"Thanks. Where did you even find that?" 

A short fumble produced a tinderbox from his pockets. With the flickering light of the torch Nathan looked around. A gap was almost hidden between the rocks. Something threw a shadow against the wall and he crouched to look at it. A small statuette of gold, well preserved looking and looking like a wolf.

Nathan reached out and the wolf's muzzle clamped down on his arm.

His breath stuttered in his chest. The wolf tugged, surprisingly gently considering the ferocity of before. Nathan moved backwards where the wolf pulled him and then he was let go.

After a moment, Nathan dared to breathe again. "Not touching that, got it." His voice shook. When he got to his feet he palmed his face. The wolf pressed up against his thighs and licked the hand that was close to its face in apology.

"Alright." Nathan hesitated a moment before he patted the wolf's head. All the aggression had seeped out of it as quickly as it had appeared. Then Nathan turned his gaze to the gap in the wall. He looked over his shoulder. "But I can go this way?" He shone his torch inside. It wasn't far. What lay behind the gap seemed to him like a small room, or a big one. He couldn't tell for sure with how dark the shadows were. They were black. Anything could hide in them. Nathan shuddered at the thought.

The wolf pushed past him and squeezed through the gap.

"Guess that means yes," he said uneasily.

Nathan held the torch in front of him and followed the wolf through the crevice. It was a tight fit, despite the weight he had lost throughout the last months. The rocks dug into his belly and he tried to keep his crotch from hitting anything as best as he could. He didn't bother looking too much into the nooks and crannies, just in case he found something looking back. Again he shuddered at the images his mind presented him with.

The cave behind it turned out to be small with another crack leading to yet another cavern. 

"Where are you leading me?" Nathan whispered to the wolf's back. Its ears swiveled into his direction, but otherwise there was no answer. "I hope we will find our way back." At least the next crevice was a little wider, less hidden even if he was in danger of hitting his head on the low ceiling as he followed the wolf along through yet more caves and corridors. He marked the walls for his way back. _If_ he was going to be able to go back the way he had come.

Nathan squinted against the sunlight when they came out the other side of a mountain, at least it seemed like that. Had they really been walking for so long? Sharp cliffs fell down to a canyon, leaving only a small path to walk along. He could just make out a river snaking through it at the bottom. It was a sheer drop that made Nathan's belly swoop uncomfortably. He had given up talking to the wolf, which seemed determined to lead him _somewhere_. He had to hope it was something worthwhile, but his gut was telling him that it was more than that. They were heading farther and farther into the undiscovered parts of his map.

At the first house he saw, Nathan let out a soft sigh of wonder. It had been more than worth it to follow the wolf through a labyrinth of caves. In fact they were still in the mountain. The walls of the most gigantic cave that Nathan had ever seen was rising up around them, but there was light up the top, bathing everything in twilight. At some time the roof of a natural chamber must have caved in and people had built their home here, their refuge, bandits and pirates from the far away sea.

"Libertalia," Nathan whispered in awe. "Wolf, you've lead me to paradise."

The wolf nudged him, looking up at him from hazel eyes. Nathan carded his hand through the fur on its head. "Thank you." 

Then they moved forward. There was so much to see. So many houses. Most of them were damaged in some way. Time had gnawed on them and there was no one around to repair them. For hundreds of years they seemed to have stood empty. What Nathan wouldn't have given to have his brother at his side to see this. Nathan entered one of the buildings with the wolf at his heels and looked around. A kitchen, a bathroom, a living room, a bedroom, all in all a luxurious house. More luxury than anything Nathan had ever seen and it had been lived in, once upon a time. He found clothes, half-rotten, and cutlery, books that fell apart in his hands before he could read anything in them. The ones he could read were almost illegible.

"This is amazing," Nathan whispered to the wolf and followed it again when it set out in front of him, urging him on.

"Not what you wanted to show me, huh?" This was already a find, more than he had ever hoped for. He imagined himself repairing one of the houses and living there, among the ruins. The track to a village to get supplies could be done in two days, maybe three with one of his horses. There was even enough to eat for them around here. The light from the collapsed roof had encouraged plants to grow. 

"Sam and I were so close to finding this place," Nathan mused and abruptly his mood darkened. Living here alone among the dead? He would have wanted his brother at his side for that, live out the years with him until they grew bored and moved on.

All was quiet in the ruins. Only the occasional rustle of an animal broke through it along with his own footsteps. The wolf led him to the biggest house, set against the far wall. 

"This is amazing," he whispered, reluctant to disturb the eerie atmosphere. It took a while to cross through the cave, it's sheer size enough to allow a whole town to be build inside. Nathan couldn't stop his gaze from straying. The beauty around him was amazing. He tried to take everything in at once. What he wouldn't have given to stop and stare, to enter every building and see what lay inside, but the wolf was pushing him on relentlessly. 

This, he had searched for this.

He had no clear idea how much time had passed. On the way he scribbled his thoughts into his notebook, stopped to sketch out some detail or other until the wolf nipped his leg and they moved on. 

"Jesus, what happened here?" Nathan asked once they reached the house. There were corpses covering the ground in front of it and lying on the steps leading up to the entrance. The wolf let out a huff.

"Guess that means it was an important house," Nathan commented to the wolf as he saw the gruesome scene. The front door had been cut in with an axe it seemed. It hung off its angles and inside there were more dead. "Follow the corpses. Always a great idea," Nathan muttered as the wolf weaved between the bodies. 

They led them down a flight of stairs that, fortunately, were cut out of stone, not wood, and leading down into the belly of the mountain once more.

"How far is it?" Nathan asked as he lit a torch. By now his legs were hurting from constantly moving. Hours ago they had set out from the cottage. It would be approaching evening. Would it be possible to reach their horses again. Nathan doubted it. The wolf huffed in answer and then Nathan lost all his ability for speech at once as they walked into the next chamber.

Gold. It reflected the light of his single torch and threw it back tenfold. Everything was sparkling and Nathan, not turning his gaze away from the shine in front of him, nearly toppled a brazier trying to light it. Then he could put down his torch to move closer to the treasure in front of him.

He didn't notice the wolf hanging back, watching him, but it walked up to his side again when he knelt in front of the pile. It was a huge pile. Nathan had never seen anything like it before in his life. 

"We're rich." His voice came out strangled. "We're beyond rich." He let some of the coin fall through his fingers. 

This is where the man from the cottage had been, where he got money for his supplies and never told anyone about it. And maybe Sam had been here, too, before he had disappeared or maybe he had become lost in the caves. Maybe, if not for the wolf, Nathan would have gotten lost and found his brother as well.

Sam.

Suddenly Nathan's eyes burned. Here he was in front of the biggest treasure he was ever going to find and he was about to cry like a little girl. The anguish came over him all at once, as if fifteen years of grief were let loose all at once inside of him. 

He prevented the first sob from escaping his throat, but by the second, the wolf was pressing against him and he wrapped his arms around its neck to hide his face when the shudders wracked him.

The way here had been so easy. Why had they never found this and _where_ had Sam gone. Nathan was openly crying, tears streamed down his face. The wolf whined and licked his face.

"I wanted to find this with Sam," he sobbed. At least he had the wolf. Time passed while Nathan cried and the wolf whined, trying to comfort him. Then Nathan pulled back only far enough to press a kiss to the wolf's muzzle. He buried his face back into the wolf's hide.

At first he didn't notice the change, how his tears fell against fur that receded, melting into skin. Then arms came up around him and Nathan startled back.

"Nathan," Sam's voice was raspy from misuse and tear tracks were on his face as well. "You found me."

For a moment Nathan was frozen. Then he let out a shout.

"Sam!" Nathan wrapped his arms back around Sam's neck and Sam's arms tightened around his waist. His brother was naked, but he hardly noticed while they clutched each other. "Sam!" Nathan cried out again. He would have said more, but in his mind there was no space for words, just that name over and over again like a mantra.

Pressed against him, Sam was muttering into his ear, thanks and pleas and prayers that he didn't hear. 

Surrounded by Sam and the treasure Nathan lost his sense of time and he didn't know how much had passed until he finally loosened the death grip he had on his brother.

"How- you were the wolf?" Nathan asked and pulled back only far enough to see Sam's face. His brother was still a solid weight against him.

Instead of answering right away, Sam leaned forward to kiss him. "Thank you," he whispered against Nathan's lips. Despite himself, Nathan's eyes fluttered shut. One of his hands was in his brother's hair and for a moment his mind shut down again. He was kissing _Sam_ , his brother, and it had been everything he had ever wanted, all wrapped in one little moment.

"How could you ever believe I wasn't going to love you back," Sam continued, lips still so tantalizing close that Nathan felt pulled forward like a magnet and kissed him again.

Only when Sam gave a small shiver in the chill of the treasure room, did Nathan snap back into himself. "You're going to freeze," he said briskly, voice trembling, and Sam gratefully nodded when he was pulled to his feet. Sam wobbled and Nathan wrapped his arms around his waist to steady him.

"Sorry," Sam mumbled. There was a bit of red dusting his cheeks. "Fifteen years as a wolf and all that." He gestured vaguely and the movement made Nathan suddenly aware of something he hadn't payed any mind to. His brother was as naked as the day he had been born. Nathan's ears flushed slightly and he averted his eyes from anything that could be taken as below the belt.

"Fifteen years?" Nathan's mouth hung open. Of course his mind had run through the possibilities. It would make sense, considering what he had read in the journals, when the wolf showed up and Sam disappeared. But what was most important was the realization that his brother had been gone and all this time he had been alive. Nathan would have just needed to look for a wolf. Of course he wouldn't have. Not back then. He would have shot the wolf on sight.

And he had avoided this area for so long.

They were still pressed against each other. Nathan didn't want to let his brother go. There was so much he had wanted to tell Sam, but now Nathan could barely think of anything. His brother was back at his side. He could hardly believe it.

"Yeah," Sam rasped. His voice was quieter than Nathan was used to, than his memory said it was supposed to be. "I'll tell you later, back at the cottage," Sam added. A shudder wracked his body again and Nathan quickly let him go to pull clothes out of his backpack.

"Thank you," Sam said. Their fingers brushed when he took the clothes. Sam's gaze was on him, but Nathan looked away when he pulled them on, back to the treasure.

"Let's pack some of that up and go," he said, just to have something to say. At Sam's nod he started shoveling as many jewels and coins into his backpack as it could hold without ripping the seams. Beside him, Sam knelt, brushing their shoulders together, and filled his pockets with them as well.

"We'll be rich men," he said. The smile on his face made Nathan ache with the familiarity.

Nathan grinned back at him. "We will be."

For a while they worked in companionable silence and when their pockets were filled they stood as one.

"It's a shame we'll have to leave the rest behind," Sam said wistfully. They hadn't even made a dent into the piles upon piles of treasure, but even with the small amount they now carried in their pockets... it was enough to buy a farm. Or anything else they wanted. Pure gold. Nathan had never owned this much at once. 

"We can return," Nathan offered, "get more. Our supply would never run out." He gestured to the gold, still reflected by the fire in the brazier. 

To that Sam nodded. "Maybe we can do that. Together."

They locked eyes. "Together," Nathan echoed and smiled.

"For now let's return to the cottage. Without fur it's much colder." Sam shuddered to make his point, making Nathan chuckle. 

"Yeah, we better go," Nathan said. He threw one last longing back as they left the room and saw Sam do the same. 

Their shoulders brushed when they walked through the ruins, back the way they had come. Nathan wanted to linger for a while, see everything there was to see. Go into every house and piece together how the people must have lived here. Another part of him wanted to leave this place behind. Now that the sun was dropping, the corpses were even more creepy, the abandoned ruins more eerie.

"We can come back here," Sam said, noticing his hesitation. His teeth were chattering softly, but urged Nathan on to quicken his step.

"Yeah, we will," Nathan answered. Outwardly, Sam looked fine, but there was a somewhat wild look still lingering in his eyes. There were lines on his face that hadn't been there fifteen years ago. "But first we'll get you someplace warm."

"I wouldn't mind that," Sam said. The bag was heavy on Nathan's shoulder. Suddenly Sam stumbled and Nathan reached out to steady him.

"What's wrong?" Nathan asked, the worry in his gut spiked.

A sigh was his answer, Sam shivered under his palms. Then Sam said, "Nothing. Just... I haven't walked on two legs in too long. I'll get used to it again." He waved Nathan's hand away and they resumed their walk.

Inside the caves Nathan held his torch high and oriented himself on the marks he had left.

Sam nodded to them. "I couldn't tell you before. Good thinking," he said. Occasionally he bumped into Nathan and Nathan tried not to tremble. The feel of Sam's lips on his was still vivid in his mind. He wanted that again. Out of the corner of his eye he glanced at his brother. There were a lot of things he wanted. Even if it was only something innocent like sitting beside him, just telling stories like they did in their youth.

Once they reached the wolf statuette again, they rested. From here on out there was only the woods between them and the cottage.

"Let's camp here," Nathan said. It was an unnecessary thing to say, considering that Sam had already lowered himself against one of the walls, well away from the statuette, Nathan noticed. Still, he nodded. 

Outside, the sky was a canvas of orange and red. The sun was almost at the edge of the horizon. 

Sam nodded again, a little belatedly at Nathan's words. Then after a pause he cleared his throat. "Yeah, good idea." He was eying the statuette uneasily.  
Nathan followed his gaze.

"You didn't want me to touch it. Why?" He finally asked, after Sam stayed silent.

Sam nodded towards it, hands in his lap. If Nathan didn't know better he would have thought that his brother looked uncomfortable in the clothes. He was shifting on the spot, but rocks weren't the softest anyway. "It was the first thing I saw when I entered the cave. Then I can only remember being the wolf. I think- I think I ran back to you, but you didn't recognize me."

A cold shock went through Nathan. He had forgotten that. It had only been a small moment in the devastation of Sam not returning after he had gone to relieve his bladder.

"Thank god my bullet missed." Nathan shook his head at the memory of the wolf that had stormed into his clearing. Now he remembered how he had yelped and pulled his revolver. He suppressed a shiver at the 'what if'.

"You were a shoddy shot back then." Sam smiled crookedly and gestured to the revolver at Nathan's side. "You've improved a lot since then."

"I've had good teachers." At a visible shiver, Nathan nodded towards one corner of the cave, which looked only a tad more comfortable than the one Sam had chosen and took off his backpack. "Get comfortable. I'll get stuff for a fire."

Sam shook his head and got to his feet. "We'll be faster when we work together."

Nathan nodded in agreement, but felt the corners of his mouth pull down as he watched Sam move around. Some things never changed, like the fact that Sam couldn't let Nathan do things alone. His pack Nathan left leaning against the cave wall and they went out, used the last fading light of the sun to gather wood. Then Nathan built a fire under Sam's watchful gaze.

"You've grown so much," Sam said wistfully out of the blue and Nathan sat down beside him when the fire was going stronger. He let out a disbelieving laugh.

"I was an adult when you disappeared," he felt compelled to point out, lest Sam had forgotten that he had been in his twenties when he had gone on alone. Before Sam could answer, Nathan turned away to pull a blanket out of his pack. It wasn't much, but while traveling he had grown used to sleeping on the hard ground or on horse back.

Sam's voice was soft. "Not what I meant."

At his tone, Nathan paused in shaking out the blanket. "What did you mean then?" His brother had looked away, but now he turned hazel eyes towards him again and looked him up and down slowly, wistfully.

"You're more self-assured, more confident in yourself," he finally said. If there was more he wanted to say, he didn't vocalize them. Instead, he looked into the flames.

"Yeah," Nathan said, at a loss of words. "It's been a long time," he added lamely.

Sam nodded and remained silent. It wasn't a bad silence. They had never been with Sam, not even when Nathan had started getting a tingle in his belly every time he looked at him.

"Let's get some sleep. I'll keep first watch," Nathan said after a while and urged Sam to lay down, back to the wall, still close enough that Nathan only had to reach out a hand to touch him.

"Wake me up when it's my turn," Sam sighed and yawned. Nathan's heart skipped a beat when Sam scooted closer so his head was almost touching Nathan's leg. Then it skipped again when Sam, maybe unconsciously, reached out and curled his fingers around Nathan's ankle. He couldn't really feel the touch with his boots in the way, but it reminded him of the way the wolf had arranged itself in its sleep to keep touching him.

A few hours Sam made a noise in his sleep, jerking Nathan out of his own doze that he had fallen into. Disoriented, Nathan looked around himself, trying to figure out what had woken him. The cave was dark, shadows even darker thanks to the fire, and Sam was made another sound, whimpering. A nightmare. Nathan shook him awake, watched Sam come alive with a start and a wild look in his eyes. If it hadn't been for his human shape, Nathan would have thought that it was still the wolf by his side. _It had been Sam_. The wolf and his brother were one and the same, he had to remember that.

"Are you alright?" The words sounded loud in the dark and silence of the night.

The palm that his brother rubbed over his face was agitated, then he shook his head. "Yeah, I'm alright. Is it my turn?" he asked sleepily. Nathan's traitorous heart skipped again at the way Sam rubbed his eyes in the low light of the fire. To distract himself, Nathan added some twigs to the flames. Sam's hand on his thigh startled him.

For a moment Nathan didn't dare to breath. They watched each other in the light, neither of them moving until Nathan nodded and they traded places without further words. Nathan closed his eyes with the cave wall propping him up, his legs against Sam's side. He slept.

At dawn, the gentle touch of Sam's hand on his shoulders woke him up and Nathan blinked against the light of morning that was falling in through the cave's entrance.

"Time to go. We can be back at the cottage quickly as soon as we're back with the horses," Sam said and Nathan nodded. They shared the supplies that Nathan had taken with him in comfortable silence and set out again, through the woods and undergrowth.

"When did you find the treasure?" Nathan asked a while later, after a twig had caught him in the face and Sam had laughed at him. Like before, the trees seemed to stand closer together, making progression slow.

"Hm?" Sam chuckled and ducked underneath some overhanging branches. Nathan followed suit.

"You said you were turned and then you came to me. What happened after?" Nathan clarified and moved past a tree that looked pretty much like every other tree here.

"Oh, yeah," Sam said. He turned to look at Nathan over his shoulder. "I ran away, back to the cave and kind of got lost inside of it," he admitted. His voice sounded wistful, head now turned away, not looking at Nathan while he was lost in thoughts and memories. "Then I started using my nose," here he grinned, "and found the way to Libertalia. It was a shitty situation to be in. As a wolf you don't have any need for treasures."

He fell silent for the next few feet. Nathan followed him, unwilling to break the precarious atmosphere. 

"I hunted," Sam started and broke off, shuddered. Nathan found himself reaching out, touching Sam's shoulder.

"Raw meat took some getting used to. I lived there for a few days until the guy from the shack came and I cozied up to him and he took me with him." He lapsed into silence once more when they reached the undergrowth that required them to crawl to reach the other side.

Nathan consulted his map. Not far now. They were almost back at the clearing where the horses were, hopefully, still waiting.

He hesitated. "Have you ever tried to find me?"

Sam turned to stare at him, busy picking twigs out of his hair while Nathan brushed leaves off his clothes. Nathan felt only a little bad for needling his brother with questions, but on the other hand... they hadn't seen each other for over a decade and Sam as the wolf had had four paws and a good nose. They had to have been something to make himself known to Nathan. Everything that had happened, he wanted to know.

"Of course I did," Sam scoffed and gestured helplessly, "I couldn't leave!"

Nathan stopped what he was doing and stared at his brother. "What?"

"Yeah, I could only move in a certain area." Sam brushed past him and Nathan stumbled after him through the undergrowth. "Remember yesterday? When you walked ahead and I didn't followed?" At Nathan's nod he continued, "It's like I walked into an invisible wall. Some unseeing line I couldn't cross."

"It that why you led me to the treasure?" 

Sam nodded. "Yeah. I didn't want you to leave empty-handed at least. Even if I had to stay behind." He shrugged sheepishly and Nathan grabbed his arm.

"Sam...," Nathan said helplessly. He didn't know what else to say. The thought of leaving the wolf behind, and now knowing that it was _Sam_ he would have left behind, hurt. It didn't bear thinking about. 

"Don't 'Sam' me," Sam said and took Nathan's hand in his, brushed his thumb against Nathan's palm, "It would have been the right thing to do." 

"It really wouldn't have been," Nathan said. He wasn't about to admit that his voice was a little choked.

They looked at each other and Nathan moved closer, wrapped his arms around Sam again and felt his arms come up around him in turn.

"I'm glad the curse got broken," Nathan whispered against Sam's ear. 

Sam chuckled. "I couldn't agree more. You wouldn't believe how much you start missing opposable thumbs after a while." 

Then Sam cleared his throat and moved back, out of Nathan's arms who wanted to pull him back in. Instead, they resumed their way.

"For that matter, what broke the curse?" Nathan asked just as they reached the clearing. 

Sam shrugged and stopped a little away from the horses. Thank god those were still there. "I'm not sure. What you did probably had something to do with it," Sam said and stepped closer as Nathan rearranged the bags to allow his brother to mount the other horse. 

"What I- oh..." Nathan felt himself flushing. Damn, he hadn't even tried kissing Sam again after... everything. Now he really wished he had. Maybe his ears would have burned less. 

Once the saddlebags were distributed more easily, Nathan gestured to the saddled horse. "You take this one."

"You're alright riding bareback?" Sam asked, but Nathan could hear the hint of relief in his voice. 

"Of course I will. Wouldn't be the first time," Nathan said and lead his horse to a rock. Getting up on a horse was always a little difficult without a saddle, but these mounts were soft-tempered at least. 

Sam's horse pranced nervously until he managed to rein it in. At Nathan's questioning look he said, "I think I still smell like wolf." 

"Maybe at the cottage you can wash yourself," Nathan returned with a shrug and Sam nodded. 

"That would be great. I've only got a sort of wash in the river and lake in the last years."

"Sort of?" Nathan snorted. 

Sam raised his shoulders. "Dip in and out." Then he laughed and Nathan joined in, imagined the wolf taking a swim. 

They urged their animals into a slight trot, leaving the thick undergrowth behind them. On either side of them, the trees started to ease up, allowing them to ride side by side. 

"How was it, being a wolf?" Nathan asked after they had been on the way a while, watching Sam's face. The horse had calmed underneath his brother, walking in a trot and nipping at fresh new grass growing along the way.

Sam turned slightly in the saddle, facing Nathan. "Well, you can't really do a whole lot with only paws," he wiggled his fingers at Nathan, making him grin, "and I can't wait to eat meat again that isn't raw."

"I gave you cooked meat," Nathan pointed out, laughing.

Sam closed his eyes and gestured for him to be quiet with a sly smile. "Huge difference between being able to cook your meat yourself and only tearing into whatever you find or are given."

Nathan's grin softened. "You're right."

Up ahead the cottage was finally visible through the trees and Sam urged on his horse. "Are you coming or what?" he called over his shoulder, making Nathan snort and hurry after him. Furtively, he tried to keep his mind going _there_. 

Once inside, they re-kindled the fire and Sam let out a sigh when the warmth washed over him. Still wracked by the occasional shiver, he sat down in front of the fireplace and was silent, while Nathan checked the supplies. Together they would use up more, but there was still enough to last them two more days before they had to go out to the lake and fish or hunt.

Suddenly, Nathan felt nervous. With two people in it, the cottage felt even smaller and there was only one cot. Nathan felt warm just thinking about tonight, and then he felt cold. There may have been love confessions, sort of, but it didn't mean they would now go _further_. 

Keyed up as Nathan felt, he started heating up the kettle, preparing food by throwing the last of their supplies together. 

"What are we going to do now?" he said over his shoulder. Sam had scooted to the side to give him space to work and at his words he looked up. 

"Do?" he echoed. "I'm going to wash as soon as you're done with that," at that Sam gestured to the kettle. "And then... what do you want to do, Nathan?"

Nathan ducked his head and sat down beside Sam while their food cooked. "I want to get back to Libertalia, look around."

"Not going to head to Sully?" Sam teased. Their shoulders brushed when he leaned closer. 

Nathan scoffed. "He'll still be busy in that brothel. We found _Libertalia_." 

Sam let out a laugh and nodded. "I guess we did." He leaned back on his hands. "I can't believe you trust Sully of all people."

"After everything... Sully helped me a lot when you were gone," Nathan defended him and saw Sam's face fell. "I thought we could visit Sully anyway, catch up with the old man," Nathan suggested anyway. Sully and Sam hadn't always seen eye to eye. Probably because of the jobs they had been on together. Not all of them had gone well. 

"I'm sorry," Sam said, "I wish I could have been there." There was a bitter tone to his voice and before Nathan could cut in that he wasn't _blaming_ Sam, his brother had already gotten to his feet and was tasting their food. 

Silently, Nathan got the bowls, one of them liberated from the bandit camp, and held them out for Sam to fill with stew. 

They ate in tense silence. 

"Mind if I heat up some water for a wash?" Sam asked after a while. 

Nathan shrugged, there was a bitter taste in his mouth. "Sure. This cottage is as much yours as it is mine." He turned his focus back on his bowl and poked unenthusiastically at his food.

Beside him, Sam finished up his own bowl and got to his feet again. The bowl was deposited on the table and Nathan's gaze followed Sam around as he moved the basin and chair into a corner of the room and picked up the bucket. 

Nathan's heart began racing when he saw Sam leave the cottage. Hurriedly, he dropped his now empty bowl and tried his best _not_ to run to the door. 

Sam was at the well, heaving up water. 

"Are you alright?" he called out when he saw Nathan standing in the doorframe, gaping like a fish.

Nathan winced and rubbed the back of his head. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine." Then, to look like less of a fool, he walked over to his brother's side and helped him pull up the bucket of water. 

"I could have managed alone, you know?" Sam casually pointed out. A little too casually to be sincere. Nathan shrugged and tried to pretend he had gone outside for the exact reason of helping Sam, instead of checking that he wouldn't just disappear if Nathan took his eyes off him. 

"Missed me already?" Sam with a teasing note in his voice, but when Nathan's head whipped around, his eyes were soft, understanding. 

Nathan's shoulders sagged. "Was it so obvious?" 

"It was to me," Sam agreed. Then Nathan was graced with seeing him flush, if only slightly. "But only because I wanted to ask if you were going to come with me."

At that, Nathan had to laugh. "So why didn't you?" he asked while they heated up the water. 

"Couldn't make it sound not pathetic," Sam said with a grin. 

They went out in a more comfortable silence after that and Nathan's heart started racing once more when everything was ready and they stood beside the basin, now filled with warm water. 

"Are you going to watch?" Sam joked, glancing at him out of the corner of his eye.

Nathan startled out of his thought and threw up his hands. "Of course not. I'll leave you to it." He gestured to the water and retreated to the cot. Outside the sun had dipped down again while they had worked. 

"Suit yourself," Sam said and then Nathan was left to stare as Sam _didn't_ unclothe and wash one piece of anatomy at the time, but instead stripped naked and sat down. Their mother had taught them not to stare uninvited, but for a moment Nathan forgot that particular lesson. In fact, his mouth ran dry.

In the past, Sam had been muscled, with a thin layer of fat softening his features, but now he was Winter-lean. And scarred. Nathan forced his gaze away as he saw the scar the bullet had left, but he caught peeks out of the corner of his eyes. 

He swallowed as Sam ran the wet rag over his legs, washed between his toes and Jesus Nathan had never been particularly interested in the grooming habits of _anyone_ before, but the proximity of the cottage only enhanced the intimacy of what Sam was doing. 

When his brother cleaned his groin, Nathan found himself watching and cursed himself for not being a little closer and sitting at an angle that made it impossible for him to see everything _in detail_. He only saw Sam's hands move between his legs, caught a glimpse of his cock and flinched when Sam's voice broke the silence. 

"Like what you see?"

Nathan's eyes snapped upwards and he took a deep breath. He hadn't even been aware that he had been holding it. 

"Yeah," he breathed out. Then he flushed and Sam raised a brow at him, smiling.

Nervously, Nathan rubbed a hand over his face and forcibly concentrated on the bedding. A second later, he snuck a look as Sam washed his torso and arms and face. 

"You want to take your turn?" Sam asked him as he was done. Nathan was doing his best not to stare too obviously while Sam pulled a shirt over his head and a pair of pants suitable to sleep in for the night up his legs. 

"Yeah, if you've left the water clear enough," Nathan grinned and Sam chuckled. 

"It's clean enough for you. And you need it," he replied, pointing to the grime still covering Nathan.

Nathan waved him away and they switched places, Sam crawling onto the cot while Nathan stripped stripped off his clothes and took a seat on the chair his brother had vacated. 

The tension was almost palpable. Sam's eyes were on him, interested and maybe a little leering. It made Nathan's cock fill with blood. He was torn between hurrying and making it a show. But he wasn't sure if Sam was going to like the later. When he glanced at his brother, Sam's eyes were wide, fixed on the expanse of Nathan's chest. Maybe he wasn't going to be quite as opposed to a show.

In that moment Nathan wanted to throw Sam's words back at him. _Like what you see?_ , as he slid the rag over his chest, lingering over a nipple. But he couldn't make his voice work. All his usual quips had deserted him in the face of what could be.

Sam's mouth opened, but he didn't say anything. 

Nathan hadn't been shy for years, so he squared his back and held Sam's gaze as he trailed the rag down his belly and between his legs. Then he sighed at the touch of the rough cloth against his sensitive skin. Sam turned onto his side on the bed and spread his legs, letting the bedding fall across his lap in such a way that Nathan couldn't see if he was getting as excited as Nathan or not. But when he raised his eyes it became clear. 

Sam licked his lips. 

"Want me to come over?" His voice was rough and Nathan's heart fluttered. For a moment he entertained the image of Sam walking over to him, front of his pants tented. Then he discarded it and shook his head. 

"Almost done," Nathan said and finally looked away to wipe the rag over his thighs and arms until all of him was clean. Then he got to his feet and let the rag fall into the now filthy water. 

Sam watched him unmoving as Nathan crossed the room and grunted when Nathan poked him, urging him to make some space for Nathan to get in as well. "I'm not going to sleep on the ground," Nathan pointed out, a teasing lilt to his words. The anticipation only rose when Sam scooted back against the wall to make room for him. Nathan slipped underneath the blankets. Then he froze. Theoretically, he had known that the cot wasn't build for two, the edge just a hair's breadth from his back. Theoretically, he knew what he _wanted_ but he hadn't been quite prepared for the feeling of them pressed together from chest to knees, of Sam's clothes against his own bare skin. On Nathan's exhale, Sam shifted a little and one of his legs slid between Nathan's own.

Despite himself, Nathan held his breath. Their faces were so close together he could feel Sam's lips brush against his cheek. The touch repeated, deliberate this time.

"I missed you, every day." It slipped out unbidden. Nathan hadn't mean to say the words out loud.

Sam's pulled away, just for a moment, then he breathed out and surged forward. His lips were hard and unforgiving on Nathan's, before he paused and continued softer, melting against Nathan or maybe it was Nathan that melted against him. The only thing Nathan was sure of that it was his hands first that came up to hold onto Sam's hip. In turn, Sam's palms trailed up over his arms to his shoulders and Nathan let out a moan when Sam pushed slightly, urging him to turn. 

"Do you want me to--" Nathan said, pulse fluttering in his _throat_. They didn't have any slick, but he _wanted_. 

Sam laughed quietly. "Just get on your back." And Nathan went, scooted onto his back, with Sam moving along so he was straddling his waist.

"I missed you, too. So much," Sam whispered against his lips and at once kissed him again before Nathan could get his thoughts lined up again. His brother's mouth chased away any coherency. Then Sam rubbed downward with his groin, brushing them together through the layer of Sam's sleepwear.

"Fuck, Sam," Nathan whimpered and whimpered again when Sam did it again, more deliberately, one slow, steady glide that made Nathan helplessly push up against him.

"True love, Nathan" Sam whispered out of the blue, rubbing down again. His eyes were intense, still a little wild as if the wolf was only one step away. Nathan would have to ask him how much his mind had changed in the other shape, how much was _Sam_ and how much had been a wolf, but he couldn't bring his thoughts in order when Sam moved so wantonly against him, breathing hard. It hardly seemed important right now.

Nathan's hands scrambled over the fabric of Sam's sleepwear, searching for skin.

"Easy there," Sam shushed him, but he was quick to sit up and strip out of his shirt, making it easy for Nathan to reach up and roam his hands over the expanse of Sam's belly and chest. 

Then, when the fabric hit the floor, Nathan pulled him down against him once more. Their bare chests pressed together while Sam rocked against him, pulling a moan from them both.

"What did you mean?" Nathan asked, belatedly. His hands slid down Sam's back and to the top of his ass. He let his fingers tease under the waistband, making Sam hiss against his cheek. 

"True love's kiss. Cheesiest way to break a curse," Sam mumbled, sounding embarrassed. His palm on Nathan's belly, heading downward broke Nathan's line of thought again. He couldn't _think_ with Sam's hands on him and it was unfair that Sam was still so coherent. True love. Years ago he had stopped pretending that it wasn't love he was feeling for his brother, but he wouldn't have thought... 

"I love you," Nathan whispered. That much he knew at least. Everything else could wait till tomorrow. He beat his brother's palm in reaching its destination and Sam's breath stuttered when Nathan let his hand slip into the front of Sam's pants and wrap around his cock. Precome was gathering at the tip of his own cock, the slide against the fabric was growing more slippery. 

Sam's back bowed and he let out a guttural moan. "Harder, god," Sam groaned.

"Been too long?" Nathan asked, smirking a little at the wanton display his brother was making, straddling him and throwing his head back when he fisted his cock a little rougher than before. His grip was too tight and dry, but Sam didn't seem to mind. Nathan clawed at the waistband of Sam's pants one-handed until Sam helped him, shoving his pants down so Nathan could finally _see_ him, too. And then it got even better when Sam pulled Nathan's hand away and wrapped a palm around them both, wet with spit. Their cocks slipped together and Nathan _moaned_.

"Christ, Nathan, the sounds you make," Sam whispered heatedly against his neck, bowing over them and stroking them both.

Nathan bucked up. Their cocks were pressed together, _rubbing_ together when Sam moved and Nathan moved with him. Everything was too hot, too much and not enough all at once. Nathan let out a breathless whine, hands clawing at his brother's flesh and Sam pressed against him.

"I love you, too," Sam whispered into his ear and Nathan was gone.

He shuddered. Sam's grip grew _wetter_ and he let out a choked little moan against Nathan's ear as his own hips jerked, cocks slipping together aided by Nathan's come.

"Please," Nathan panted and he didn't know what he was asking for, only knew that he felt exhilarated.

Sam gasped against his collarbone. "That was -damn."

"Yeah," Nathan panted. His hands roamed over Sam's back while Sam took his hand away, settled it up against the side of Nathan's neck and kissed him.

For a while they simply stayed lying together, exploring each other's mouths. Then Sam sat up and tucked himself back into his pants. He laughed when Nathan beat him to his shirt, threw it farther away so Sam had to get up and get it or remain bare.

"Alright then," Sam said and settled half on top of him again. "You're going to sleep without." 

Nathan sputtered and laughed. "You wish!" His laughing quieted when Sam regarded him seriously. One of his hands slid over Nathan's chest and down and if Nathan had been a few years longer the heated look would have been enough to get him hard again. But he wasn't that young anymore, so his cock only gave a weak twitch. 

"I'm glad you're back," Nathan whispered and interlaced his fingers with Sam's on his stomach. His brother looked at peace, looked _right_ , squeezed beside him in the bed. Maybe they could get a house with the treasure they were carrying away. A cottage with a bed big enough to lounge in all day. They could try out how many times they could love each other in a single day.

"Me too." A smile flashed at him in the dark and Sam's arms curled around him. "What are you thinking about?" Sam asked a moment later. 

"You, me and a bigger bed... some oil," Nathan said, flushing. His fingers brushed patterns against Sam's skin.

"Oil, huh?" Nathan could feel Sam grin against his skin. "Everything you want, Nathan."

They were silent for a while. 

"Hey, Sam?" 

"Yeah?" Hair brushed against Nathan's cheek when Sam turned his head.

"Why didn't you try to make yourself known as the wolf?" The thought had been nagging at Nathan. If he had known he would have tried _kissing_ the wolf sooner. 

Sam snorted. "What was I supposed to do? The first time you almost shot me. Should I have pissed my name into the snow?"

That teased a laugh out of Nathan, imagining Sam's name in the snow and the wolf sitting attentively beside it. He probably wouldn't have understood. 

"You're right."

"Hey," Sam nudged him, "it worked out in the end."

"It did," Nathan agreed and pulled Sam's face down for another kiss.

Then they slept.

 

The next morning, they packed what they could carry and Nathan looked at the map again, reminding himself of where the bandit camp had been.

"So, off to see Libertalia again?" Sam asked.

Nathan looked up. This time around, warmer clothes adorned Sam. He was smiling happily.

"You make it sound as if I've been there a dozen times already," Nathan returned, teasing. 

Sam laughed and Nathan was swept into a hug. A kiss was pressed on his mouth that left him dizzy. "Never!" Sam's expression turned serious as he let Nathan go.

"We should hunt of fish first. Libertalia is only overflowing with gold, not food."

"Yeah," Nathan nodded his agreement, "we should go to that camp I told you about first. The guys who shot you. There may be some supplies left for us."

Sam tilted his head in thought. Then he nodded. "Sounds like a good plan."

They carried their things outside and readied their horses. When Nathan was about to mount his, Sam stopped him. 

"What about Sully?"

"We'll get to him after. I know all his places and right now he will be in his favorite brothel."

A leer passed over Sam's face. "A brothel?" 

Nathan shook his head with a mock sigh. "Last night wasn't enough for you?" He grinned and Sam pressed a lingering kiss to his lips. 

"It only whet my appetite," he teased. "What do you say, Libertalia had some horizontal surfaces..." He trailed off. Nathan's belly was doing somersaults and he had to clear his throat.

"Maybe we can see if the bandits have some oil lying around," he pointed out. 

"Want to find out what it would feel like, fucking on a pile of treasure?" Sam smirked at him and Nathan laughed again.

"That will be some interesting bruises."

They shared another kiss, barely there as they chuckled at the image their minds presented them with. 

Then Nathan threw a last look at the cottage and Sam followed his gaze. Inside, the ashes were growing cold in the fireplace. Everything was back in its place. It looked uninhabited, cold now that Nathan had packed his things. The map was in his pocket.

"You're going to miss it?" Sam asked him. There was a thoughtful expression on his face. He stood close enough that their shoulders brushed together. Nathan reached for his hand.

"Will you? You lived there longer," he pointed out. 

After a while Sam shook his head. "No, I have the most important stuff with me." His look told Nathan what he meant and he nodded. 

"Let's go," he said.

They turned away, mounted their horses and set out into the woods.

**Author's Note:**

> :V


End file.
